Challenge 52: THE END!

Wow, didn’t 2011 finish in a real hurry!

Somewhere amongst spending 3 weeks with family and friends in Victoria at the end of the year I did manage to finish my 52 week challenge! From the great ocean road at Christmas I then drove back to Sydney and then up to Queensland with the lovely Maria, and spent a month at the amazing High Spirits Retreat, where I studied the beautiful Hawaiian massage known as Ka Huna.  More importantly I learnt about where I’m at and became clearer about what I want to focus on this year.  I agreed to part ways with Maria, then stayed on for another course after we’d broken up to try to find that delicate balance of letting go of her and still loving her. A real challenge for us both.

Yes indeed, 2012 is a year of change and challenge also. This year has seen many new experiences, including new skills in massage, a dietary cleanse, road trip to Queensland, naked on a beach (you get very comfortable with your own body doing Ka Huna massage!), dealing head on with a break up, crying during massages, screaming during massages, writing rap songs and rapping to a group, wearing singlet tops, learning poi and doing fire twirling with it, acting in a short skit wearing tight tiger shorts, diving to collect mud, having a psychic reading, having fun while shopping by myself (!), registering domain names, dance meditation, having a Mayan calendar reading, riding a Vespa scooter for transport for two months, deliberately throwing up when feeling fine, beginning a masters degree, signing a 6 month work contract with the words ‘ad hoc’ in the ‘days to be worked’ column, signing a contract to rent a clinic space months out from being ready for clients, beginning a business, doing my first hypnomassage, creating my first home brew, catching fish in Port Phillip Bay, getting a two wheeled licence and buying a motorbike.

I’ve met lots of friends since I got back from Queensland, messaged lots of people I care about, met up for lots of massage swaps, been to inspiring talks and seen inspiring movies put on by inspiring groups. There’s more, much more, and I feel open and ready to explore.

Thank you 2011 for the inspiration!

So, it really was a challenge, given all of this action in mind and body, to finish this blog!  It really felt like the challenges were done and dusted, so it took some will (and 6 months) to find the right head space to sit down and finish this.

Ah, the challenges!  The helicopter flight Maria and I finally succeeded with on the 3^rd attempt after being foiled by weather.  It was fun to fly a helicopter!   The book ‘The girl with the dragon tattoo’ that I was reading backwards (last chapter back through to first chapter) I only got a third of the way through. The synchronised swimming lesson I organised with a friend didn’t happen as we ran out of time before I left for Victoria last year. The wakeboarding didn’t happen in Victoria as I got caught up in the family fun. I have a goatskin under my bed waiting for me to put on my drum. At the start of the year I was called in for jury duty but wasn’t required, so I didn’t count that one either.

Actually patient reader, there was one challenge I did this year that I didn’t write about, so I’ll claim that here. It is my gift to you for persevering through this blog!  It was a challenge in the Gestalt Therapy group. I managed to share something with the group that I never thought I’d tell anyone. Ever. Sometimes those things we hold in our mind as shameful really do take on a different look in the bright light of day. It took work with my therapist and my amazing partner at the time to allow me to take that step. It was so big for me I’m not going to tell you what it was (what a tease!). It was incredibly confronting and scary, yet powerful and healing when I shared it.

As was 2011.  Powerful, challenging, and healing. It was powerful in that I was able to really step out into a new way of thinking about things. With a real WHY NOT? Mindset. It was challenging to keep it going, keep coming up with new ideas, to fit it in amongst all the work and study and to write it up each time. Not to mention some of the experiences themselves were tough (it took 2 days to psych myself for the Silent Disco!). And lastly it was healing, as it bought me back out into the world in a new and interesting way. I now say yes a lot more, and have begun to step out more into the world more bold, and more often.

So to finish I’d like to thank you loyal readers (and all the casual readers!) for the time you spent here. You rock!  Thanks again to Marco Poot for the inspiration, and for everyone who encouraged, joined and shared ideas.

I may even throw up another post from time to time this year. There are all kinds of fun things out there waiting to happen. And waiting to be written about. Don’t forget that whenever you see someone doing something you think looks interesting and cool, they were a beginner once too. Give it a shot.

Hope you’re having an amazing 2012!

Victory! The blog is done. The challenge complete. Way to go WARRIORS!

Challenge 51: Preventing a suicide

It’s a fascinating society we’ve created, where so many people feel alone. Feel like they have nobody who will listen to them. Nobody willing to try and understand them. Humans have never lived together in such great numbers or density. Yet despite the sheer quantity of people around us, for many people the quality of contact is simply not what they want in their lives.  I mean, honestly, what’s that all about?!

People feeling lost and isolated, despite the fact they are living in a sea of other people, plenty of whom feel the same way.  Wicked eh?  Luckily we have all this technology to connect us, haha.

Lifeline is a telephone service offering a chance for people who are really struggling to have someone to talk to.  Someone up for a chat, who is supportive and encouraging.  Since I started volunteering in 2010 the focus has changed from a support line to a crisis support and suicide prevention line.  Callers who are actually suicidal or in the process of committing suicide (eg have taken pills already) are relatively rare, although they do of course happen. Toward the end of the 2011 I had one such caller. It just so happens I had a supervisor listening in on the call and she was able to call the ambulance for me. Staying with the caller and keeping them on the line, and supporting them in their will to live (the fact they called says part of them doesn’t want to die) was a challenging experience. In the moment I was very focused, and I found I was calm and supportive. When the call was over and I had a chance to reflect I wondered how it all turned out. Volunteers with Lifeline rarely find out. I was fairly philosophical though and felt I’d done all I could.

Feeling there is no hope, no way to change the feelings or stop the thoughts or feeling there is nothing that can improve the situation, is a dark place to be. When overwhelmed and in pain suicide can seem the best solution to make the pain stop.  It may even seem best for everyone, as who would want you around when you’re in that frame of mind?

The suffering is generated by relentless negative thoughts and the awful feelings they are producing in the body. The fight and flight response can be deadly if there’s no fight or flight.  The fact it’s self inflicted is hard to grasp when you’re in that space, and especially hard to change even when you do have the awareness.  What a powerful organism our minds are!  You can use them as an incredible tool to support yourself or as a weapon to bludgeon yourself into a bloody mess.

Being able to talk about suicide openly with someone is healthy and helpful. It takes it out of the mind and into the room, where it can be looked at more clearly. Thoughts about suicide aren’t uncommon or wrong.  I’ve been there. Friends have been there. It’s a permanent solution to what is usually a temporary problem.  Sometimes it’s simply biology.  Neuroscience has found that less connections to the frontal lobe from the limbic system make a person more prone to these debilitating patterns of thought.  I’m studying courses now that give me language I never had when I was younger.  I can get more support for myself when I need it.  I give more support to myself too, which is in fact the most important thing.

Even then there have been times recently when I’ve felt like calling lifeline myself.  It takes work to create new pathways in your mind in response to challenging situations.  To take control of your thoughts and generate new responses to the world.  It’s an active process, and the awesome thing is that it’s possible.  Neuroplasticity is phenomenal!

I know where most the lifeline callers are coming from, and it’s a privilege to help support them.

So, let’s finish this cheery post with a quick survey*.  What music would you choose for the Lifeline hold music:

‘Baby please don’t go’

‘Stayin’ Alive’ 

‘Crazy’ (never gonna survive, unless…)

‘Here Comes the Sun’

The sun is always there, don’t let your thoughts hypnotise you!  The 2011 challenges kept me noticing the sun in my life.  May you feel it in all its glory!

*Not an official Lifeline survey, bless them and their awesome volunteers. 

Challenge 50: Fish Farm

Maria was driving the stunningly forested winding road between Healseville and Marysville. We passed a sign saying ‘Trout Farm’ and on a whim Maria swung the wheel last minute and in we went. Most of my previous fishing experiences involved a lot of wondering where all the fish were. At a fish farm that thought doesn’t enter your head. There were fish everywhere! The ponds were crammed full of them. Some of the fish were clearly hungrier than others, as in one pond we had no luck.  Apparently they have ponds that are harder to catch fish in for those who want more of a challenge. In the pond we chose the fish were queuing up to jump on the line. Maria jagged one first cast, and the only difficult part was trying to get the fish to be still while I pulled the hook out of its mouth. I caught a rainbow trout too, and for a few extra dollars we had it filleted, cleaned and on ice.

This farm was amazing, it had BBQ’s everywhere and seemed to have all you could want for a day out fishing.  They sure tasted great on the BBQ that night as we met my sister and her family in Yarrawonga for New Years.  The fish my nephew had pulled out of the Murray River the day before tasted even better.  Happy 2012!

 

Fishing made easy

Challenge 49: Hot air ballooning

I’m not afraid of romance. It was a milestone birthday for Maria, and we celebrated with a surprise birthday treat. Well, half a surprise (better than none). When I requested she get up with me at 4am for her birthday she was wise enough to connect the dots. My misdirection about a morning hike to see the sunrise didn’t really work too well.  We were in the beautiful Yarra Valley, North East of Melbourne, and were staying in town for a few nights of good lovin’.

It was around 4:30am as we sat in a winery full of people, half asleep, half excited. We chatted with a couple at the beginning as we had tea, started to wake up, and waited for the pilots to work out where they wanted to fly from. The wind direction was hard for them to pick, as every test balloon they let go of simply went straight up until it was out of sight.  Apparently sometimes there can be too little wind!  Of course, that does depend somewhat on whose company you keep. 

It was a chilly morning as we waited, but after several site changes they made their decision.  It was game on!

It was a great experience, filling these graceful balloons full of hot air and watching them slowly lift into the sky. We looked over and saw that the couple we’d chatted with at the beginning had a balloon to themselves with the words ‘will you marry me’ on the side.  Wish I’d thought of that!  She was caught completely by surprise, and of course said yes. It was very funny hearing her account afterward as we enjoyed our champagne breakfast.

The balloon rose up and up, and we went all the way through the clouds…until we were above the clouds and all we could see was the sun beginning to rise behind the mountains, and white fluffy stuff everywhere. It was a beautiful experience, and an amazing way to start the day. So silent, so serene.  So floaty.  Who knew getting up so early in the morning could be so rewarding?

Challenge 48: Slacklining

This sport isn’t as lazy as it sounds. Think bendy tightrope. A 5cm wide, 2mm thick and 15 metre long material cable that you connect between two points (usually trees) and then attempt to walk on. It moves around a bit, in fact can get a real giddy up, unlike a traditional ‘tightrope’, hence the name. Maria ordered her Gibbon Slackline online after seeing some people doing it in a park. Some of the You Tube videos of people slacklining are absolutely amazing! What people can do on a skinny rope!  Madonna even had a slackliner on stage with her during her latest Superbowl halftime performance.

We first setup the slackline down at my brother in laws parents place at Bells Beach at Christmas. This is where we realised that it isn’t nearly as easy as it looks! Having said that though, after a shaky start, Maria was able to hula hoop on the slackline. Impressive. Each time we set it up our confidence grew. It was even a great way to make friends when camping. Kids love it!

The talented Maria

The key with the slackline is to focus on where you’re going (your goal, in this case the end of the rope) and not where your feet are. Don’t look down! Don’t worry about the swaying of the rope, just keep on moving.

What a great metaphor for life!  Focus on your goals, your dreams.  Keep moving toward them.  Don’t give any attention to all of the distractions and movement.  Don’t spend too much time dwelling on where you are now compared to where you want to be.  No matter how far away the goal seems, keep focused on it as you walk toward it.  Of course you will be distracted.  You will fall.  You will occasionally leap from the line high into the air with a mighty shout.  Sometimes it’s fun to jump off track for a while.   When you get back on though, keep your eye on the prize.  What’s the prize, and where are your eyes?

So, get to it you slackers!

Challenge 47: Light My Fire!

Forgive me readers for I have sinned.  It has been 4 months since my last blog post.  I was going to dump them all into one post, but decided to have mercy and post shorter individual versions instead.

So, here we go!

I did this challenge with Mark who inspired this 52 week challenge. His writing is awesome, check it out: http://thelifeofeye.wordpress.com/2011/11/08/week-49-31st-october-06th-november-light-a-fire-with-sticks/

Xanthorrhoeas: the Australian fire tree

Thanks Mark for this one. I found it fascinating that there were very few hard woods in Australia you could light fire with, as opposed to North America and Europe.  The Aboriginals of course figured it out, and the tree the aboriginals called the black boy (now commonly known as grass trees, or Xanthorrhoeas) is what they used. They rubbed together two pieces of the dried flower stalk to create fire.  They also used other parts of the plant such as the resin for glue, the tough seed pods for knives and even made a fermented drink from soaking the flower spikes.  So you could get drunk, make a weapon and make fire from the same tree…whoah!  Nature does have a sense of humour.

In addition to Mark’s account is that this for me was a real lesson in patience, and in not counting your cooked chickens! After Mark had successfully lit his first fire solo after a good amount of work (and experiments with the drill, the vice and with 2 of us working at it) I created an ember within about 20 minutes of trying. I was convinced it would light easily, and as a result blew on it a little hard, and the ember just blew away and vanished!

I don’t know how long it took me after that, maybe an hour of blister producing, exhausting work, before I created another ember. I treated this ember as though producing fire from it was the last chance for life on earth to continue. I nurtured it, caressed it, held it delicately, and graced it with the most gentle and encouraging of breezes from my baited breath. When it burst into flames I was so happy!

It showed me clearly just how much more we value the results of hard work above the things that come to us easily. I’ll also note I was ready to throw in the towel, and to live off Mark’s reflected glory, however he insisted I do it too.  Thanks mate, I’m sure glad I did.  Now I feel like a real man!

Working it!
Smokin'!C'mon baby...The ecstasy of FIRE!!!

Challenge 46 – Rocketeering

No, not racketeering.  Although this challenge finished with us being swindled by a young girl.  Or so it was alleged.  Rocketeering.  While it’s true that this word does not exist in any dictionary, it should.  A verb for firing rockets.  And fire a rocket we did! 

El Pooto; that name has reverberated throughout my year as the inspiration behind the 52 week challenge.  Indeed, the ideas man himself.  This challenge and the next were both his brainchilds and I was the fortunate passenger.  Much like a monkey getting launched into space I jumped around a lot in excitement and gave lots of encouraging grunts.  Whilst the kind of hobby rocket we would be launching was small in comparison to those NASA send into space, it was HUGE in our imaginations.  And it was all ours to control.  Houston, we are good for launch! 

Hobby rockets have been around since the 50’s, and have been known to send payloads of up to 100kg into the air, and to have reached altitudes of up to 5000 metres.  Inspiring stuff! 

We however cunningly went for the smaller but fatter rocket that was called Riptide.  It wasn’t going to reach the altitudes of it’s compatriots but it would stay within sight at around 250 metres and probably be good in water too I imagined, which fortunately turned out to be correct.  Plus it was blue.  I like blue.  

Ready for launch

As soon as we decided to launch near the river I instinctively knew Murphy would combine with the wind to blow it into the river.  And thus it was.  When I told my sister I swam in the Maribyrnong she told me that she hoped I had no open wounds.  When her and some Melbourne Water colleagues kayaked down it last year they were paranoid about splashing each other.  Luckily I’ve been immersed in more putrid things in my time and survived unscathed. 

You swam where?!

The biggest thrill about this challenge though was definitely the launch.  There I was, with firing pin in hand ready to press the button.  Pootman was on camera duty and ready to snap photos of the launch, the countdown began…5…4…3…2…1…and nothing.  Not even a fizzle.  We waited a minute then went in to investigate.  One of the alligator clips had come off.  Back to the countdown.  I was half expecting it not to work the second time, so when it made an almighty WHOOSH! and it took off at an incredible speed into the air I jumped around like a 5 year old in a lolly shop.  It was awesome!  Then when the parachute (which I had packed) ejected smoothly I was doubly thrilled and let out some big cries of appreciation.  It was so good I was super keen to retrieve it for another attempt, hence the swim. 

Ignition and blast off!

Pootman also had a successful launch, however our enthusiasm overrode concerns about the strong winds blowing, and our rocket traveled so far it went out of sight and cleared the Maribyrnong completely.  A passer by told us a young girl had picked it up.  Houston, we have a problem.  A surreal search through a Yarra Trams family day event at Flemington Racecourse was very funny, but ultimately fruitless.  Probably lucky, as custody discussions had already begun! 

I don’t know why I didn’t know about these rockets when I was a kid but I sure know about them now.  And so will my nephews next Christmas.  Fire in the hold!

Challenge 45 – Modeling

I walked home from my first modeling assignment walking on air. At the pedestrian crossing I fancied the cars all screeched to a halt because they recognised me, not because they’d only seen me late. I fancied the stares of passers by were in awe of seeing a celebrity. Then I realised it was probably because I was grinning like an idiot.

Yes indeed, I successfully pulled it off. I modelled in front of a drawing class!

Fortunately for my modesty they let me leave my hat on.

The question they all kept asking me in fact was ‘do you draw?’ to which I just responded, ‘no, but I write’. When pushed as to what I write I initially said a blog, but given that most of the people drawing were pensioners who didn’t seem sure what a blog was I elaborated into attempting to write a book about these challenges (true) and childrens books (also true). It’s funny how when in the presence of someone creative your ego kicks in and you try to impress them.

Unlike most life drawing classes which require a variety of different poses, the trick with this class was to hold the same pose for each sitting. Each sitting was 20 minutes long for a total of 2 hours. Holding the pose I found ok; keeping my eyes open was a mission! The swaying tree branch I was focused on in the distance seemed to be singing me lullabies the whole time.

‘Yes yes, get to the bit about what it was being like naked in front of a roomful of strangers’ I hear you ask. Well, that reminds me of a story. No, not the Emperors New Clothes. Although that could have some relevance, as I actually did think I was clothed. A story of a wolf in sheeps clothing.

Ok, it’s true. I was clothed.  Maybe you already knew that as you’d seen the pictures.  I did in fact look up how to pose for life drawing and it seemed a wee bit harder to get into, and so I took the easy local option. I had started to psych myself for it too.  In the end though I was really happy with this experience with such lovely people.  This particular drawing class was formed in 1964!  They’ve been gathering on Monday mornings at 10am in Manly in their current location since 1988. Now that is some serious staying power. And some really talented artists were in the room too. Check it out below. One of the old guys who had been retired for 20 years said he wouldn’t miss it for the world. They had some delicious morning tea, and a really nice atmosphere.  They spent some time discussing their Christmas party at Manly dam the following week.  It was cool to see people doing something they love to do.

I was paid $40 for the 2 hours: bonus!  It was much harder work though than what I had imagined.  Meditation with eyes closed is one thing, but trying to focus on a point with eyes open and imagine you’re made of stone is another.  Apparently I did pretty well, and was feeling refreshed after a couple of mini sleeps.  Look out Vogue, here I come!

Various amazing artists

Challenge 44 – Hoopla

Hooping is back!

Although hooping is estimated to have been in existence for thousands of years, the modern plastic hula hoop craze began in the 50’s. The Hula part of the name came from British soldiers who noticed similarities to the Hawaiian Hula dance. There was plenty of hula hoops around when I was growing up, however they went out of fashion around the same time the yo-yo started to invade our schools.  Go figure.

Well, dust off your old hoops people, cos the hoop is back! A quick search of the internet will find hooping now being promoted for its health benefits, from digestion through to building muscle tone and as a cardio workout. There’s people who have run marathons with them and who can hoop a 90 pound tyre!  Nevermind the circus performers who can have dozens of hoops going at once. The world record for longest consecutive hooping is 90 hours. Holy rotating hoop Batman!

Really though, it’s hot watching a pretty girl (yes, you Maria) move her hips and make that hoop dance. It is of course not nearly as hot when you’re smacking yourself in the head with it as you try and master a move, or chasing a hoop across the park.  Or as hot as your sunburn the next day as you were having so much fun you forgot to put on sunscreen.

By the end of our few hours playing though we could both spin the hoop above our heads and bring it gracefully (more or less) down to revolve effortlessly (more or less) around our hips. Maria was even a gun at revolving it around her knees and her feet! Amazing. The girl who ran the course in Bronte park first picked one up 5 months ago, and has been doing it obsessively ever since. I was truly impressed by the skills she learned in such a short time.

I was so dizzy, my hips were spinning.  It sure was a fun way to spend the morning. Give it a whirl!

Fire hooping, for added flavour

Challenge 43 – Straight Hair

Straight hair, yeah yeah.

Interestingly it was only a few weeks ago when good friend Tanya was in town that she offered to straighten my hair for a bit of fun. Turns out we found plenty of more interesting things to do on the weekend she was here and it didn’t happen.

And then just the next week, completely unexpectedly, I suddenly found my hair straight.

No, it wasn’t an electric shock, although looking at the photo you could be forgiven for this assumption. It was in fact due once again to those cunningly misrepresented social vouchers!

I’d found a deal to get a haircut from one of the group discount sites. Or I thought I had. It was about $20 from a really fancy hairdresser in Manly. I needed a haircut and thought I can’t go wrong.

I booked it in and then just before I went down there had a quick look at the voucher. It read:

Hair wash

Protein treatment

Blow dry

Styling

I read it again in alarm. I’d bought a voucher from a hairdresser and it didn’t mention a hair CUT! I mean, honestly, who goes to the hairdresser to have them do your hair for you and not cut it?

Some people obviously. So I asked about it, expecting them to be willing to charge me a princely sum to add a haircut into the package, only to be told that they wouldn’t cut my hair with this deal. What?! No up sell? The only time when I really wanted them to and they don’t offer it.

Strange but true.

So the friendly English bloke who had just arrived in Australia offered a hair straightening. How could I say no? We chatted about surfing while he got the iron out and bit by bit for the first time in my life turned my tight curls into straight hair. One man straightening another man’s hair. Perfectly natural.  I’d come a long way from my days growing up in the country.

At school I’d always longed for the kind of straight hair rock stars had back then. The kind you could grow halfway down your back and when head banging look like you really meant it. I resented the fact that the longer my hair got the more it curled up. The best I managed at school was a weird cross between an afro and a mullet. Over time of course my hair started to really grow on me (hehe).

My flatmates were very amused. Interestingly though I was on the second day of a course that afternoon, and only a couple of people commented. I had a few curious looks. And then later a few people told me they hadn’t noticed a thing. Now I know how women feel when they fork out a fortune for a haircut and people don’t even notice. Honestly!

My Dad had driven into town from Victoria and picked me up from my course that night. He gave me one look and said ‘you need a haircut Michael’. I bet Mum would have been a bit more intrigued!

I had been told that as long as I didn’t wash the hair it would stay straight, however by that very evening it had already started to return to curly glory.

So, I tried to play it straight, but all I got was a weird hair day and another reason to stop buying those damn vouchers!

Challenge 42 – Breaking the boards

One of my earlier blog posts was the study of NLP. Well, now you can call me Master.

And at the end of the course, after everyone in the class had done a brilliant job of a filmed 20 minute presentation to showcase their new skills, we had one more skill to master. The skill of the Karate Chop!

Yes indeed, we had to do a palm strike through a pine board as a symbol of breaking through obstacles in our lives.

This requires focus young grasshopper!

Without focus, as some people in the class discovered, your hand will bounce back off the board and result in a painful wrist. Ouch.

I had watched a few people succeed and fail before I made the attempt. And after getting into position, and breathing, I made the strike. Speed and follow through are the key. As is clearing your mind of thought. I’m sure an image of Mr Stay Puft may have crept in at the last minute. Fortunately however this wasn’t Ghostbusters, just board busters…and BAM! That board was cleanly broke in two.

I enjoyed it so much that when the chance came up to break 2 boards I stepped up again. It’s a good feeling having so much focus, and complete certainty, that your palm will go through the boards. I felt very clear and very sure it would happen. I was also sure that if I could palm strike my tax return to get it done I would choose that every year.

It was a good metaphor though for what we are capable of when we focus, and when we are certain of our abilities to deal with whatever comes our way in life. The only certainty we can have in life is the certainty we generate for ourselves. I’m certain I’ll enjoy teaching what I’ve learnt these past weeks. And I’m certain you’ll return to this site again. How could you not?

Ai Yah!

Challenge 41 – Facial

Be warned. This blog entry contains scenes of graphic violence.

It began with a humorous suggestion by a few friends: get a facial for one of your challenges.

The idea didn’t bother me, and I was curious about why it’s such a popular thing to do. I wondered why people couldn’t cut up their own cucumbers to put on their eyes and rub whatever moisturiser they were using in for themselves.

So I bought a couple of vouchers online and Maria and I went off to Waverly to get a facial. Oh darling, all the hip couples are doing it now!

Turns out the lady doing the facial has been in the industry since the 70’s and was the first person to open a beauty salon in Bondi. She had trained in London and when she first came to Australia there was no beauty industry and Australia was seen as very backward.

It appears this lady Melissa has had a lot of success in the field, and at her peak had 24 staff working in her Waverly salon and owned two others. She is now looking to sell up and retire, or at least cut back to working just a few days a week. It was interesting that the first thing she did when we walked in was to show us pictures in a very old book of a younger version of her doing makeup. Her authority strategy to show us her expertise was a very obvious one!

When I asked her why she was doing the deal, given that she had heaps of regular clients and was about to close up shop, she said she was virtually harassed into it by the online deal salespeople. She said she was getting multiple visits a day by different sales people. In the end she figured she might meet someone interested in the business.

She does however make no money on the deal. The social sites take 50% and they also keep all takings if someone doesn’t show. It’s a pretty brutal system, although obviously has appeal to people looking to get their name out there or find new clients. She said some of the sales people are on huge commissions, hence their pushing it so hard.

And so, to the facial itself. Melissa is something of a talker, which I imagine in this field is an asset. The fact most of it was about her success in the field and with how happy her customers are seemed fair enough given we were in her domain. I think though by the time she got to the third story about a man she did a facial for who was resistant initially and who ended up yelling her praises to the world afterward I was really ready for some quiet time.

However, I must say that Melissa gives a hell of a face massage. I was so relaxed after 30 minutes of having creams rubbed into my face that I would have agreed to anything. So when Melissa mentioned that I had a few stray hairs on my eyebrows she could tidy up I readily agreed. Next thing I knew something really hot had been smeared on my left eyebrow. ‘Too hot darling?’ she asked before suddenly tearing what was obviously wax away with a significant number of what were previously very comfortable hairs. I have never had anything waxed in my life, and I was completely unprepared for this kind of sudden violence. And it kept coming. Hot smear and RIP. It was all I could do to keep my screams from unleashing in shock at this sudden turnaround in our relationship. One minute she was a caring facial masseuse, and the next a violent hair tearing demon!

And in the midst of all that she casually mentioned that the waxing would cost extra. Talk about kick a man when he’s down.  I guess she’s got to make money somehow with the social media deal not making her anything. I thought about mentioning how inappropriate it was not to discuss it sooner, but quickly remembered that she was wielding hot wax, and who knows what other torture devices, and quickly decided that at the first available opportunity I’d run. She used some weird electolysis zappy machine after that, and my journey to the dark side was complete.

Ok, so it might not have been so bad had I been expecting it, but it definitely wasn’t fun, and women get this done regularly!  And a significant number of men if Melissa is to be believed.  Arrrgggghh: the price of beauty.

I drew the line at goatee waxing

So when it was over I paid the $25 extra for the bonus torture session and walked out of there. Yes, face may have been glowing.  Yes, my eyes may have appeared clearer. Yes, I had never had such sculpted brows. And no, I shall never be setting foot in such a place again.

Challenges 39 and 40 – Surfing and Sugar Free September

Bah, weekly challenges.  I give you monthly challenges!

1) Surf every morning for the month and see every sunrise

2) Cut out sugary sweets, such as cakes, biscuits, chocolate and ice cream. 

On one of the challenges I was dedicated, committed, perseverant and unshakeable.  And the other, well…it was hard ok!

My love of sleep ins versus my sweet tooth.  Sportsbet would have struggled to set odds on this one.  Sweetness versus light.  Craving versus sleep in.  Sugar high versus beddy bye. 

Which habit is stronger, which desire is deeper, which would you choose?!

Sugar AND sleep! How do you give this up?

 As it turns out, if you’d bet on the sugar letting me down, you would have been sweet as.  The sugar.  Man, that was a tricky one.  I found it was such a habit that one morning I ate a slice of banana bread before my brain kicked in.  SUGAR!  I ordered an iced Mocha at one point, and for some reason was surprised when it came with cream and ice cream.  MORE SUGAR! D’oh.  I had it anyway.  I mean, I don’t want to waste food.  Challenge or not that would have been sinful.  That was about halfway through the month, and it was delicious.  The fact that it was so tasty highlighted to me that I had cut down significantly.  I ate jam at several points too, even though that is mostly sugar.  Also I couldn’t give up BBQ sauce with BBQ’d meats, even though I’m pretty sure there’s significant amounts of sugar there too.  Orange juice was in the glass before I clicked that this was yet more sugar.  It’s everywhere man!

I did though make some tough calls.  None of the free chocolate wheatons at work.  No department birthday cakes at work when it was all laid out in front of me.  Just fruit salad.  Even a work lunch where every dessert on the fancy restaurant menu was delivered to the table I managed to restrain myself.  There was also (yes, the corporate world is fuelled by sugar) several days at work last week where there seemed to be cake everywhere I looked.  I even had a pre-ordered 3 course meal where I gave my delicious looking dessert back at the end.  My sister Susan was aghast when I told her of my plan, and suggested a week would be a better plan.  She was onto something.  So, it wasn’t sugar free, but it was definitely sugar reduced!

I also found that through eating so little sugar at work my energy levels were much more balanced.  I didn’t crash in the afternoon as much as previously, usually after indulging in sugar.  This was pretty handy considering I was up at 5am every day for the surfing challenge.

And the surfing challenge is where the real September success came.  Thirty consecutive sunrises, watched from a prime seat in the Pacific.  I had the luxury of friendly company for almost every session too.  I had messaged most of my surfing mates at the start of the month and had a great response to the call given how early the starts were.  Flatmate Johnny was a trooper, and joined me almost every day for the month.  Neighbour Heike was also brilliant and made almost every day in the first 2 weeks before going on holidays, several of them after only a couple of hours sleep.  Toby and Regi came when they could, and there were other mates who dropped in. On a number of days there were 5 of us bobbing around, getting some waves and having some laughs.  It was great to start the day socially doing something so fun.  Thanks to everyone who joined in.  I’m looking forward to many more surfs together.

I saw whales one day, and dolphins another.  On one of the days I was out the surf was huge, messy and for me a little scary.  Then some dolphins began playing right near me.  They were surfing the waves and popping out the back.  I felt a lot better after that, and eventually got a great wave all the way in.

Here are the surfing stats for the month: 

33 surfs

30 sunrises from a surfboard

4 different beaches

9 different surf buddies (Heike, Johnny, Toby, Regi, Maria, Jase, Watto, Steve, Amrit)

3 different wetsuits

6 different surfboards

Only one day without a wave (just went for a long paddle) and only two days surfing solo 

Social, fun, rewarding and the perfect way to start a day.  Once into the routine I just jumped up when the alarm went. 

And now?  Well, it’s the long weekend and I just enjoyed two 8am sleep ins.  So good!

Morning light

 

 

Waiting for the sun

 

 

Challenge 38 – Art Therapy

 How long since you’ve sat down with crowns and a huge sheet of paper and just drawn something?

I can’t remember doing that…as an adult.  I did try painting a few years ago.  I painted my girlfriend at the time from a photo.  It turned out like Planet of the Apes.  It was so bad I almost wish Id framed it for comedy value.  So when invited to participate in an Art therapy class all I could think of was that painting.  And that if anyone had art that needed therapy, it was me.

As it turns out though the class isn’t to improve your art.  In fact, the art itself is far less relevant that what you express through the art.  Phew!  Lucky for me, as even with crayons in my hand I’m capable of producing drawings that 3 year olds would frown upon.  Nevertheless I drew with gusto, and appreciated the time spent pre drawing where we visualised what we would draw first.  This helped alleviate any creative blockages.

It was however the one on one sessions I had with Lainie that really connected with me.  We had some interesting exploration of my life and journey so far, and one of the things we focussed on was the Surfing September challenge.  Each day during September I’ve been up at 5:20am to go surfing, and at 5:10am for the last few weeks of the month.  And the significant effect this has had on my sleep patterns.  I’ve been more productive and life has felt richer for the experience.  Of course, I’ve had some pretty sleepy afternoons as well.

A talk by a sleep specialist I went to earlier in the year advised that getting up at a consistent time is more important for our sleep patterns than what time we go to bed.  It seems like it may be the case, as I’ve been feeling great this month.  The early surf is obviously a factor, but so is the fact that by 9pm I’m really tired and ready for bed, hence having an earlier night and sleeping much more deeply than I normally do.

And so from the perspective of these sessions I’m thinking of continuing the early starts well past September, and continuing to do something fun first thing, such as surfing, snorkelling, swimming, running etc.  I am finding it’s such a great way to start the day, and I feel more alive, energetic and alert afterward.  My family can testify that I was never anything like a morning person, and it’s only in recent years that surfing has started to change that.  The art therapy was a great way to look at this clearly and to visualise and draw the space I feel around me by starting the day so early, giving me more time to do what I want, and more time to enjoy things rather than rush through them.  I drew a butterfly (or something roughly butterfly shaped)  in the centre of the space, representing the freedom of such choices.  These challenges are having a bigger impact this year than what I could have imagined.  When I look at this year through the lens of an artist (or my wobbly 3 year old version) there’s a lot of colour, shape and inspiration.  Not to mention crayon all over the walls.  How does that keep happening?

So, I got more out of these classes than a series of sad looking drawings.  I got insight, and inspiration.

See you at a sunrise sometime soon!

Fly my pretty, fly!

 

Challenge 37 – Voice Movement Therapy

Maria invited me along to this class a few days before.  I didn’t know much about it, and neither did Maria, but it sounded interesting, and in the context of this year how could I say no?

It turns out the facilitator trained in the US and is only one of 2 people doing VMT in Australia.  The premise is that by finding expression with the voice, and by increasing confidence and vocal range, as well as associating voice movement with the expressions of the body, we can find creative expression and better connect with the stuck parts of ourselves.  This fascinates me as an adjunct to psychotherapy and in helping people find confidence in who they are through the use of their unique voice.  Plus I always love a good sing-along!

So, I went into the class with an open mind and no expectations and had a great experience.  The first exercise we did was to walk around the room expressing different sounds whilst the body is in a particular state.  We then told our story to another person (or in my case I sang it.  When in Rome…) and they told us their stories of a time when they felt like their voice was important and powerful.  Some fascinating stories emerged as we told each other’s stories to the group.  Exercises continued, where we were encouraged to be creative and explore our voices more.  I found some innovative ways to sing Baa Baa Black Sheep using the different voice tonalities we had been shown.  Fun.

We did a liberating exercise of all lying on our backs and just letting loose with whatever sounds we felt like exploring.  Some of the harmonies in the room were amazing.  At the end of that exercise I felt really light and warm and tingly through my upper chest.  Not only were the hills alive, but my body was alive with the sound of music! 

It was a very open group and it was fun being creative there.  There was space given near the end of the class to write about the experience, and some of the sharing from that was really beautiful.  The connection members of the group made with each other in such a short space through shared stories and expressing themselves in this experience was impressive.

Any therapy that encourages use of the voice is a winner in my book.  I’ll sing to that!

Moving to your voice, and voicing your movements

Sound from deep places

Recessed spaces

Expressed into the open air

Now vibrating with the expansion

The passion

Of so much sound and energy released

A treat

To play in such harmonious ways

So much unsaid can be let out

And released into the light of day

Challenge 36 – Photo Shoot

I saw a deal on one of the social group discount email lists I’m on – man, are they getting popular – and decided this photo deal was a good one.  It was a professional photo session, including make up etc for about $50.  I figured this would be useful as when I start promoting the hypnotherapy I’ll need a picture or two to put out to the world.  Plus the idea of being worked on by a make up artist and being under the bright hot spotlights had an appeal all its own.  The fine print said that additional photos were $180 each.  What kind of crazy fool would pay that when you get one for free!

I rocked up to this amazing studio in the city wearing jeans and a good shirt, with another 4 or 5 shirts as requested.  I met the photographer and he asked me if I’d bought pants as well, and was put out that I hadn’t.  I was already nervous about the shoot as I wasn’t sure what to expect, and his comment made me even more nervous.  I had thought about bringing trousers but then decided that an upper body shot would be fine.  Later we discussed further what I wanted the photos for and when he realised it wasn’t for corporate he agreed that upper body was probably better. 

The make up artist was great, and we had some laughs as she covered up my sunburnt nose and other blemishes with her bronze cream.  It was an impressive result.  I was aware of how different some girls can look when made up, but hadn’t  appreciated the subtleties of the art.  In fact this makeup artist does body painting, and showed me some of the people she’d painted that this photographer had worked with.  Also she used clay to make people look statuesque, as well as use makeup to shade body parts, such as to make women seem more busty, or even men for that matter.  Amazing stuff.  Some of the pics were very impressive and very alluring.  The photographer had mentioned to me on the phone that if I wanted those kind of fleshy shots he could provide.  I decided to keep my first professional shoot for business only. 

He must have photographed for an hour, under a range of lights and backgrounds, with different props, different shirts, different poses.  Apparently I’m a natural and the camera loves me.  I bet he says that to all his clients.  Especially when the number of photos he sells directly correlates to his income.  As it turns out I had such a good experience and was feeling the love I ended up getting extra photos.  Gestalt therapy has shown me that confluence is one of my defence strategies from childhood.  Fitting in with the crowd, keeping things smooth, keeping everyone happy.  Well, the photographer was certainly happy.  And it was a great example for me to meet my needs first.

On the upside I have a selection of photos available now for professional use.  All in a days work.

The money shot

Challenge 35 – Acro Yoga

Flying high

Acrobatics combined with Yoga?  Wow, now that is intriguing.  One minute you’re doing downward dog, next minute you’re flying through the air, arms stretched behind you or flapping gently beside you, suspended on the feet of someone lying down below you!   

Maria invited me to do a class with her friend Claudine.  I left work early and raced my bike to the ferry in record time.  The class was at the Redfern Community Centre, and after consulting a map on my phone I raced over there.  Now Redfern sure is rapidly entering the modern age, but it’s still  pretty edgy.  I was very amused by a sign in the Community Centre about rules:

No running

Wash your hands

No violence

Respect other people

Always carry your knives pointing downwards

The dangers in our yoga class though were more around your legs giving out as you lifted someone above your head, or your hands slipping apart as you balanced someone standing on your thighs as you leaned backwards into space, gripping each other for support.  And if really brave letting go of one arm.  This was cool stuff!   

There were 6 of us in the class and we worked in groups of threes.  2 people doing the pose and one being the catcher.  Luckily not much catching was required, although with tight hamstrings I found some of the leg holds pretty hard and subsequently very wobbly.  The girl I was balancing was very brave to say the least.  Claudine built it up slowly, and there was lots of advice and encouragement for the trickier postures. Core strength is obviously a key requirement.  We finished the 90 minute class with some calming massage and a foot block on the femoral artery.  The idea being that if you slow blood flow through the artery then the sudden release of blood will flush and relax you.  Sure was a strong pulse down there.  Just be careful with your feet please!

It was a fun class, and Claudine’s acrobatic personality was further demonstrated when Maria and I went back to her Redfern apartment after the class.  The ultra trendy apartment is the epitome of the changes starting to sweep this area. It’s a converted foundry with massive ceilings and funky wooden support beams.   Claudine’s husband was showing us their new kitchen table, and to demonstrate its solidity both he and Claudine leaped onto it and began demonstrating their monkey-like abilities.  I was hearing the 2001: A Space Odyssey music in my mind as they leapt and posed.  Now there’s a person who is working in the right job!

Challenge 34 – Croquet

Sure, this might be a pastime you associate with old timers and country clubs.  It is however a huge amount of fun!  I’m not kidding, Maria and I had a ball (and a mallet) learning to play this aristocratic game.  We had 2 great teachers: stalwart of the club Rosemary, who wielded a mallet with the dexterity and accuracy of a royal blacksmith, and Evelyn, who although somewhat newer to the game was pretty astute on strategy also.  Evelyn’s strategies though didn’t help us as you also need the accuracy to back up your game plan.  Rosemary and Maria put us to the sword 7-0!  It turns out Maria is a natural at this game, and entirely unafraid of smashing her opponents balls in order to achieve victory.  An opponent willing to do that is an opponent worthy of respect in my opinion.

There are a variety of games within the Croquet world, however we played Golf, which is the standard game.  Everyone has a different coloured ball and you follow the same order in hitting it.  You hit your coloured ball directly with your mallet to try and get it through the hoop, or to prevent your opponent from getting their ball through the hoop.  You have to go through each hoop in a particular direction, and first team to get a ball through wins a point.  First team to 7 points win.  Excellent fun, and quite satisfying when you take out an opponent or manage to score.  We also discovered jump shots, used when an opponents ball is blocking the hoop, which Maria and I came staggeringly close to scoring with.  Rosemary of course showed us how it was done, to a rousing round of cheers from us.

Most club members have their own mallets, some engraved with their names, under lock and key in the clubhouse.  Some people take it seriously!  We sure didn’t, and had a great laugh.  It took us at least 3 attempts to get this organised, and we were almost foiled by the weather on the day we did play, yet I’m happy we persisted.  I’m sure I’ll come out swinging again.  Croquet anyone?

Ready for battle!

 

 

Challenge 33 – Motorbike Learners

For 7 years I’ve lived in Sydney without motorised transport.  And I’ve been loving it!  No worries about parking, insurance and fuel costs, expensive maintenance and repairs.  Maintaining a bicycle is cheap and easy.  Getting a motorbike has never really been high on my list.  In fact I always dismissed it as an easy way to die.  Cycling around Sydney for the last 7 years though has confirmed my suspicion that I lead a charmed life.  So why not step up to the next level?

A couple of things I do regularly require over an hour on the push bike, which would be made a lot easier with an engine attached.  And after speaking to a friend about it I discovered that getting your learners was a pretty straightforward process.  It’s a course run over two days, 3.5 hours each day.  And it starts from the absolute basics, catering to people who have never ridden a motorised bike before.  It was really well run, and if you have the slightest interest in riding a bike then I’d recommend it for the experience.  They really do build it well from the ground up and spend lots of time getting you comfortable with the bike.  With goverment subsidies it’s only $80 for the 2 days.

Getting to the course proved the hardest part about it, as I took ferry, train, bus and eventually taxi to get out to the training site, way out near Parramatta.  The first day I’d borrowed a full leather jacket and bike boots from Stefan too, so I had the feel of leathers by the end of the day!  The next day I went back to jeans and t-shirt and didn’t feel so overdressed.  I also had the luxury of driving on day two after flatmate Cherie generously lent me her car.  Driving there reminded me of how nice it has been not to drive much here over the years.  Driving in Sydney is not my idea of a good time.

By the end of day 2 we were doing some fun laps with emergency stops and trying to remember to turn the indicator off after cornering.  That’s a challenge!  Certainly not something we ever had to do on our farm bike as a kid.  In fact, some of the tips they gave us would have been pretty handy when riding a motorbike when I was younger.

Almost everyone in our class had lost their licence at some point (crazy Westies) and one of them had even lost his motorbike L’s just before sitting his P’s test.  This guy confessed an addiction to speed.  I had the distinct impression that he wasn’t long for this world.

Several days after doing the practical training I spent about an hour sitting their online test over and over before I went and sat the real test.  I now have a rider learner permit, and 12 months in which to do the P’s practical test.

I did my first legal bike ride on the road with Toby soon after.  He has two classic manual 4 speed Vespa’s.  We went out bush and on busy 3 lane roads.  An 80km/hour motorway (just so happens to be my speed limit on Learners) and some scenic beach riding.  I rode pretty rough, but managed it ok.  Nearly lost it out bush on a steep descent with a bit much on the front brake, but somehow held it together.

The next obvious challenge is buying my own bike.  It may not be a dream I’ve ever had, but surely a convenient way to travel.  The idea of owning a motorbike both attracts and repels me with equal measure.  My family is dead against it (pardon the phrasing) and I have plenty of reservations.  I do look good in leather though.  Ambivalent?  Yes and no.  Stay posted, and keep an eye out on the road!

Day 2: fast clutch releases

With Christine and Toby's classic scooters before the ride.

Challenges 31 and 32 – Silence is Golden and Scooter Surfing

Hi, I’m not talking today. It’s Speech Pathology week and I’m supporting literacy for life. You can check out the website at http://www.speechpathologyaustralia.org.au

This was the note I printed out to give to people I encountered throughout the day.  Not talking for a whole day turns out to be quite a challenge.  One I failed before I even had my screen printed shirt on!  I was lying in bed, thinking about the day, thinking I’m going to really have to work hard to avoid talking for a whole day, when I said out loud ‘I can do this!’.  Shit.

That didn’t last long.  There were a few other times I talked to myself throughout the day too.  I think the second was at breakfast when I exclaimed out loud something that I read in the paper.  Turns out I talk to myself quite a lot.  However I did manage to keep my trap shut when out in public.  My phone rang early on, which I ignored, and I messaged the friend who rang to say I’d talk to him tomorrow.

My sister Jennifer is a Speech Pathologist.   When I originally mentioned the idea of silence for a day she told me about Speech Pathology week and their literacy for life focus.  They say:

Almost half of Australia’s working age population does not have the reading, writing or numeracy skills to effectively participate in their workplace or community, a statistic speech pathologists aim to tackle during Speech Pathology Week.

Almost half!  That really surprised me.  The fact you’re reading this is probably a good indicator you’re not in that half, but you might know or work with people who are.  It’s not something spoken about much by most people and yet it’s such an important avenue of communication.  I wish them well with their education on this and on encouraging dialog and awareness around it.  It’s not something to be ashamed of, it’s something that can be learnt at any age.

Toby picked me up on his scooter and seemed amused at my not talking.  He stuck one of my notes on the back of the helmet I wore and we headed down to St Vinnies.  He must have lived in Asia in a past life, for I’m sure he wouldn’t hesitate at carrying multiple pigs on his bike if he had to.  The mission (which I claim as a challenge) was to carry a windsurfing board that he’d picked up for $20 back to his place in Manly.  It was nearly 9 foot long and 5 inches thick, thus too big for his car, so I carried it on the back of the bike under one arm.  Toby frequently had to hold the nose to stop the wind from tearing it away (and probably me in the process).  No mean feat on a manual scooter over plenty of hills, through which he even managed to steer the bike, with 2 people and a board, around tight bends with just one hand! It was especially tricky given I couldn’t talk to Toby to tell him how it was going!  I indicated to him that I’d wrench hard on his right nipple if I needed him to stop.  Our non verbal communication was really coming together.  There were plenty of amused looks cast our way.  Nobody would look at you twice doing that in Asia, however we attracted some attention here.  So, my first experience transporting oversized goods on a scooter, but with Toby around probably not my last.  My arm sure needed a good rub after that 20 minute ride back to Toby’s place.  A big high five, and mission accomplished!

Toby had a good chat, prompted by some questions I wrote on a piece of paper, and then he rode me off to the mall.  It would be an understatement to say he’s unused to doing all the talking when I’m around!

In the mall I had a number of opportunities to give my notes out, which were mostly received with good humour.  My once a year shop even got completed without any swearing.  There was a little confusion as I wrote a note to the change room lady ‘back in 5 minutes’ as I wanted to swap a pair of pants, that she translated as me needing a basket.  She got me a trolley.  It may have been her literacy, although it was more likely my writing.  Now that’s a whole new challenge.

Later on a flatmate might have thought me rude when I didn’t speak to her, but apart from that the day was a success.

Although I’m still speaking to myself occasionally as I write this.  I might have to use gaffer tape next time.

Check out the flames on this one!

Challenge 30 – Screen Printing

The Silence is Golden challenge inspired this one.  I wanted to make a t-shirt for the challenge.  A simple symbol representing not speaking. Thanks to the internet for the texting symbology of a closed mouth.  I knew my friends Toby and Christine had a screen printing setup, and so I got to work.  ‘The simpler the better’ was Toby’s advice.

And so it was.  As it turned out I twisted my ankle in the last challenge, and so meeting with Chris was going to be tricky.  The lovely lady generously offered to pick me up, which she did, and took me to Toby’s garage.  He’d said he was happy to be phone support from Tassie if we ran into problems, but we had it all under control.  Cut out the image, tape it down.  Put a line of paint down and drag it through to fill the cut outs to paint the image on the shirt!

Done deal.  And the white on red was a winner.  Thanks Chris and Toby for your tools and expertise!  This was a fun process, and making your own shirts is a nice idea.  It was alittle off centre, as am I from time to time, but I knew that with this shirt on I’d be much more capable of biting my tongue.

This year is reminding me just how me ways there are to be creative.  And how satisfying it can be.

 

...wax off!

Wax on...

Challenge 29 – Cooking class

Rest the pastry!  That was the key secret I learnt in this cooking class in Woolloomoolloo.  2 days to make a dessert?  Well, ok then!  Run by a very opinionated pastry chef, it was clear that her time working with Gordon Ramsey had influenced her!  Not afraid to bad mouth others in the industry, or bad mouth in general, she did however know how to wield a rolling pin.

This was a woman unafraid of large numbers.  She buys butter from New Zealand by the tonne, and owns a number of patisseries throughout the city.  She bought into a winery, which she says was an easy way to lose a hundred grand, and now has multiple pallets of wine to offload, which she is using mostly in cooking.  She’s doing a lot of corporate cooking classes and is receiving sponsorship and it sounds like attention in the industry.  She is also accountable for the considerable sum of money she has borrowed to the GM of ANZ.  She did however admit that baking isn’t a way to make a dollar.  Sounds like the training may be though.  There were about 15 people in the class, and she had it wrapped up in half the time scheduled.

She gave us a demo of the 3 parts of the lemon meringue making process.  I was particularly impressed with the scale of the meringue she whipped up in her industrial mixer.  It reminded me somewhat of Mr Stay Puft from Ghostbusters…so much meringue!  I had to strongly resist an urge to start a food fight in her kitchen.  I had visions of her going straight for the knives, and not being afraid to use them.  She did mention in passing that violence was how they communicated in her family.  Italian background.  Don’t mess with the boss.  Apparently people pay her to be her apprentice.  I’m sure you’d be an awesome chef working for a few years under her.  And you’d have thick skin too!  She also told me I was annoying.  Too many questions?  It happens.  She sure exudes a sense of dominace in her kitchen.  Not to be trifled with.

Haha, I love dessert jokes.

Mmm, tasty tart!

It was only at the end of the class as I was blowtorching the meringue that I reflected that I much preferred my meringue to be crunchy.  I was thinking more pie than tart, although I think all the rest of the recipe is the same.  I’ll simply bake my pies in the oven for 10 minutes after I add the meringue!  Easy done.

It was meant to be a 3 hour class, however we were finished in less than an hour and a half, and it mostly involved us watching her prepare food herself, and very little hands on for us.  We piped the lemon filling and meringue that she prepared and that was about it.  Apart from the blowtorching.  Got to get one of those.  Crème Brulee anyone?

So the verdict?  Definitely worth the $50 or so I paid online for some of the tips she gave.  Definitely not worth the $300 that is apparently the full price for the class.  She does run savoury pie classes too, so I’ll keep my eyes open for another $50 class.  There were certainly some great tips, and I’m a little less intimidated by making my own sweet pastry now.  Thanks chef!  The proof of course will be in the eating!

Challenge 28 – Elance

As part of the Hypnotherapy course I’ve been doing this year we had to submit case studies.  I spent a considerable amount of time transcribing the first of these case studies, and had already spent a lot of time transcribing some of the videos we had been given of various masters of the art, in order to be able to do an assignment on them.  All well and good when plenty of time was available.  Lately though, despite working 3 days a week, time has been at a premium.  A lot of weekend workshops, other study demands, surfing hits, volunteer work and a wee bit of socialising (not to mention these challenges!) have conspired to make my time very precious indeed.  Who knew living such a good life would be so time consuming?

And so when a friend recommended outsourcing the work it made a lot of sense.  I didn’t have the time, but there were people who did, and who would do the job undoubtedly faster and more efficiently than I could.

Enter Elance.  A website where you can submit work or bid for work from around the world.  All kinds of work.  Elance sums it up:

‘You name it and Elancers will deliver results, often with a flourish: from writing code, crafting a marketing plan, designing your website, managing your day-to-day schedule and a thousand other projects.’

At the click of a mouse button you can have someone from somewhere else on the planet work for you.  Yes, WORK FOR YOU!  Ah, now that has a nice ring to it.  And so I submitted my first job.  I offered $30 per audio hour of transcription (I had a one hour case study to transcribe).  The reality is that a good transcriber will take between 2 and 4 hours to transcribe a one hour piece of audio.  Some people have players that will slow the audio down so they can keep up with it.  They had an advantage with mine also in that much of the audio was delivered quite slowly, and hypnotically, and would therefore have been easier to keep up with.

I was surprised at how many people bid for my work, from a wide range of countries.  Some people even bid really low, as low as $7 per hour, although usually from non English speaking countries, and their use of English didn’t fill me with confidence.  So I ended up with a woman from the US.  Within 48 hours she had done a pretty decent job if it, and I had saved myself hours of yakka!  There was of course a few amusing lost in translations, such as when she transcribed Queensland as ‘Queens Island’.   I did another 30 minute transcription with someone else for $15, who also did well given the quality of the audio wasn’t great and there were 2 different accents.

Timothy Ferriss in his book ‘The 4-Hour Work Week’ is a big fan of outsourcing work in order to free up your time.  He has a personal assistant in India who takes care of all his phone calls and scheduling.  I don’t think you’re likely to find a foreign assistant answering my phone anytime soon, however it does make you wonder how you could live more efficiently, and offload some of the jobs you don’t much care for to free up time for the things you love.  This is particularly relevant with setting up a business.  Now, who wants to bid on doing my tax return?

With the internet age there really is a world full of possibility.

Work from home anyone?

Challenges 26 and 27 – Kicking a Rugby Field Goal and Skating a Half Pipe

These challenges were done spontaneously.  Maria and I rocked up to the croquet pitch in Manly to see if we could swing a game.  And a lesson.  Unfortunately nobody was home (and they haven’t been returning my calls either!).

As we were walking back we saw a 10 year old kid kicking field goals through the rugby uprights.  It really looked like fun.  I suggested to Maria I should ask to get a lesson.   She encouraged me to do it but I let the moment pass and we walked back to the car.

The teacher in full flight

We grabbed our tennis gear, thinking we’d go for a game, and as we walked back toward the court and toward the boy again I asked him if he’d show me how to kick the ball.  I told him I was from Victoria and had never kicked a rugby ball before.  He must have been bought up well as he hid his surprise and was happy to show me.  The ball angles toward the goal and is placed on a little plastic holder to have it in the exactly right position.  You then stand at a right angle to the ball, run at it and kick it with the inside of your foot!  This was an important part of the lesson, as that kicking style meant you have a lot more control and can kick more of the ball.  Miraculously the ball managed to sneak through, just inside the left upright.  GOAL!!!

Maria had a go and nearly booted it into the tennis courts, and straight through the middle!  GOAL!!!  We had a chat to the boy’s Mum, and they were having a day out together.  She said he couldn’t get enough of rugby.  We complimented him on his teaching skills and complimented ourselves on our amazing natural talents.   His Mum suggested we move on as we were showing them up, haha.

It was then that we spotted the guys skating in the half pipe.  I jokingly said to Maria that we should try that next.  We changed our mind about tennis and started wandering back to the car, and I suggested we go take a closer look at the skating.  We did, we got chatting to the guys, and after some compliments on their abilities and paying respect to their skills, one of them offered me to have a turn.  Game on!

Stand clear!!!

And so I began like a giraffe that is first learning to stand.  Very uncoordinated, very unbalanced and very dangerous to all in the vicinity of my flailing arms and legs!  Not to mention the rocketship skateboard that kept flying out as I started to fall.   Little by little though I started to get the feel of it, and to get the hang of leaning away from the wall as you go up it.  Counterintuitive to be sure!  Failing to master that technique sees the skateboard flying away from you very quickly as you fall up the wall.  So as I began to get the hang of that I started to push a bit harder, go a bit faster, get a bit further up the wall.  Just as I started to think skating was fun I managed to lose control and twist my ankle nastily.  I said my thank you’s and hobbled off the stage.  Maria had a go, and was fortunately a more balanced than I was.  My foot swelled up like a puffer fish and I am currently sporting a very fashionable purple stripe down the side of my foot.

Skater girls are hot!

Needless to say that attempting to run before you can walk will trip up a giraffe every time.

Still, it’s given me the time I needed to finish off some study and catch up on these blog entries!  And have some much needed rest.  My feet are up, it’s raining outside, and life is good.  Just don’t expect to find me in a skate park anytime soon.  Although one of my new flatmates just bought a longboard he said I was welcome to borrow.  Stay tuned.

I’d also like to acknowledge what great connections we made with those people in the park.  It can be very easy to stay in your own little bubble, yet the curiosity and energy we bought to those two meetings really allowed for a great experience of something we had never tried before.  Instead of just wondering what it was like, we stepped forward and tried it.  And everyone there was happy to share their knowledge.  The other challenges I’ve done leading to this point encouraged this possibility.  And I like it.

Challenge 25 – Watch a TV show filmed live

This had been on the list for a while and I managed to secure a couple of the free tickets online.  The choices were limited to Australia’s Next Top Model and a new show on channel 10 called ‘Can of Worms’.  Curious as I was about seeing catfights between skinny girls with very pointy nails I decided to head to the Can of Worms filming instead, to see what kind of debate these guys could conjure.

I must admit a certain curiousity about the models show and how it was filmed, but since I was taking my girlfriend and she wasn’t so interested we went for Can of Worms.   As it turns out she couldn’t make it anyway!

A can of what now?

So I rocked up on my oddy knocky to Redfern and noted immediately the very long line of people snaking out the door.  So naturally I took a seat and read a book for the half hour for the line to dwindle, at which point it was announced that they were full and that the best they could do was offer priority for people who turned up for subsequent shows.   Most people left disappointed after being told this.

Naturally I took advantage of the free drink at the bar they offered as a consolation prize.  Curiously enough just as I was finishing the drink they came and told me there was some empty seats, and I was back in business!  Turns out there are some advantages of going to these things alone, and that you can have your free drink and watch the show too.

It also turns out I was right up front in the third row, which was prime position to watch the shenaningans.  Their compare guy did a great job of entertaining the audience while they were setting up the filming and keeping us entertained in between takes.  It went on for a long time, around 4 hours in total, but was surprisingly engaging that whole time.  Between Greg Fleet and Angry Anderson there were plenty of laughs, and there was also a ton of talent in the audience as a bunch of people volunteered their party tricks for our amusement.

Greg Fleet was the clear audience favourite, and there were plenty of people, including myself, who were unimpressed with the holier than thou swimmer girl’s down the nose views on drugs (even though she confessed there was nothing wrong with drinking wine because Jesus did it!)!  Some interesting double standards which didn’t escape the audience.  Even Dicko noted that 97% of drug related deaths in Australia are from alcohol, and I know that alcohol accounts for the majority of hospital beds taken up in this country too.  Interestingly it was only Angry Anderson who bought this up in passing as he said he didn’t discriminate between any drugs, legal or illegal, as they were all addictive.  As it turns out this was edited from the final cut, which I got to watch the next night on TV.  Editing must be a tough gig with so much filmed and only an hour to show it on tv.  Some of the editing was very smooth, and in other places you could see clearly it had been cut.  I’d never noticed that before.

A lot of the personal confessions of Greg and Angry didn’t make viewing, yet were fascinating insights into their personal journeys.  I felt privileged to have been witness to such a level of self disclosure in a public forum, and the cheers the crowd gave Greg to vote him the audience favourite showed everyone there felt the same.

At the finish they started to refilm parts of the show that they obviously weren’t happy with.  That’s when I knew it was time to get out, and when the compare suggested that if we needed to leave we could go, but he’d rather we stay there was a mass movement toward the exit doors.  As I was leaving I heard one of the crew commenting ‘he shouldn’t have said that!’.  Poor guy was probably roasted for that one!

It was a fascinating afternoon and well worth the journey on the first rainy day Sydney had seen for 2 weeks.  Can of worms?  Well, they didn’ always get into the meat of it, but it sure was interesting.  Opinion can be a fascinating thing!

Challenge 24 – Neighbourly Networking

In country Victoria where I grew up you knew your neighbours.  You weren’t always their best mates, but you knew them.  These days in the city how many people really get to know their neighbours?

Luckily for me a lot of my friends in Manly live within a stones throw.  There was a friend Regi, now back in Switzerland, who used to live just 6 doors down.  I’d been to her place once, and had heard one of her flatmates, a kiwi guy who had been living there for a decade (a long time in these parts!) had a couple of sea kayaks.

Better than a cup of sugar!

It was perfect sun in Manly.  There wasn’t a wave in sight.  I knew it was an ideal day to paddle around North head.  Stefan, Heike and I were on a nice natural high from doing the free hugs that morning (see the previous challenge) and when the idea came to me to do the paddle my neighbour came instantly to mind.  No rental kayaks are allowed to make the journey around the headland, so Kiwi Jum (Jim) was my man!  I had a little apprehension knocking on his door, however he wasn’t home, so I called Jaydn, a friend who had used the kayaks with my Swiss friend and he gave me Jim’s number.  I made a call and Jim was happy to oblige, arranging to meet me there in an hour when he got home.  He spent a half hour with us helping to adjust the rudders and give us a run down on it all!  Awesome!

Jim's unique foot pedal adjustment technique!

Jim had bought the ex rental kayaks about 6 years ago and is happy to see them used.  He has a brilliant set of wheels with each kayak that detach and fit in the back hatch.  The only downer was that one of the kayaks had developed a leak, so he didn’t think taking on the heads was a good idea.  So Heike and I (Stefan had other plans) headed down to Shelly beach and made our launch.  I took on the leaky boat. and contemplated how much sugar it would take to make up for returning only with one kayak.

It was perfect weather, and we went partly around the Shelly headland before heading over to Curl Curl and back.  The kayaks were beautiful to use, and we really enjoyed our afternoon out.  Turns out they probably would have made the longer journey, as the back hatch had was only partially full.  Next time!

Jim met the neighbourly challenge with generosity and great humour, and it was much appreciated, as evidenced by the six pack I delivered a few nights later.  We had a great chat about his plans to develop a social kayaking community.  As I said I was a bit nervous knocking on his door originally, however after chatting to Jay I was reassured that Jim would be cool, as he’d actually offered the kayaks to Jay that very morning!

So neighbours can be great to know, and not only for that cup of sugar.  Wouldn’t it be nice to live in a society where that kind of sharing was universal?  Thanks neighbour!

Paddling out from Shelly Beach

Challenge 23 – Free Hugs

Hug me til you drug me honey...

It was a perfectly sunny, huggy morning in Manly.  And did we hug!  There were man hugs, group hugs, quick hugs, slow hugs, back patting hugs, pose for the camera hugs, one handed hugs, full body hugs, lean forward from the waist hugs, animal hugs, little kid hugs.  There was even a bum grabbing hug.  This day had it all!

Some people were very wary, and there was a core of men who wouldn’t be in it, however for the most part it was a great vibe, and a great energy.  We had lots of laughs and some people were really loving it, especially the group huggers!  Thanks to everyone who hugged, and especially to Stefan and Heike for helping make it so fun.

Big hugs to Stefan!  He made the sign, researched the history of the free hugs, and got the ball rolling!  It turns out that the original guy to do this did it in Sydney.  Juan Mann was his name, and he even had to fight the law to be allowed to continue on the grounds the police banned him as he had no public liability insurance!  Fortunately after a huge petition common sense prevailed, and hugfests like the one we had for an hour in Manly are now legal.  Yay!

Check out the video to see  some of the fun:

Here’s my version of Burt Bacharach’s ‘What the World Needs Now is Love’  (I’ll sing and record it on request, haha):

What the world needs now

Is hugs, free hugs

No, not just for some

But for everyone!

What the world needs now

Is hugs, free hugs

Love’s the only thing

That there’s just too little of

Challenge 22 – A Lesson in Magic!

This challenge was originally planned to be fly fishing near Lake Eildon in Victoria. When Pooty and I got up though and looked outside we got the frighteners on. The rain was lashing and the wind was howling. A quick check of the weather report for Eildon showed similar 50km hour wind gusts. I haven’t cast a fly line before but my hunch is that wind like that isn’t going to be your friend.

So we spent the next hour throwing around ideas of what Melbourne could serve up to us. It was a Sunday, and the city was ours for the taking. We checked out all kinds of options, such as a shark walk at the aquarium, circus workshops and a naked swim across the Maribyrnong (actually I just thought of that then – a good one for summer Pootman!).

And just when we were starting to think that the day was slipping through our fingers I stumbled across the Melbourne Magic Festival at Northcote!

I was beguiled by the following video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6gPoCQp5CM

Cool. And so we agreed that Pooty would pick me up from the footy (which I was most happy about leaving at three quarter time as the Blues were being given a lesson by the Dogs) and we’d motor across town. After a few logistical games (you’re at which end of Bourke?!) we actually managed to make it there before the doors opened. Originally seated up the back, some habits die hard, we soon realised that if  we were going to learn any slight of hand magic we’d need to be paying closer attention. Wow, if only I’d cottoned onto that learning technique in school! So we sidled up the side and on sided with the side kick with the perfect side on view. And it was fun! Turns out the techniques for these magic tricks are pretty straightforward. It also turns out that it takes a hell of a lot of practice to make the trick look anything like the professionals!

Now you see it, now you don't!

Pootman and I seemed to get the basics down pretty quick on most of it, although I did have more trouble than him in making the pen vanish. I could always find a bird up my sleeve though, haha.  We had coins coming out of all kinds of places. It was good fun, and a cool insight into the magicians world of illusion.

One of my nephews was completely befuddled by the coin trick, and one was onto me! The rubber band had them going though, although my 5 year old nephew Edward wanted to hold it when it was broken. Smart kid!

I made some suggestions that the magician include smoke bombs next time.  And rabbits.  And maybe a prettier sidekick.

Magic is cool!

Challenge 21 – The Vertical Slide

This is the official description of the amazing vertical slide:

For the more courageous amongst us, parents and children alike can line up to be dropped down the southern hemisphere’s tallest Vertical Slide.

With a sheer drop of seven metres the Vertical Slide is not for the faint hearted! Experience zero gravity as you fall at a speed of 30-40km per hour.

Naturally when my nephew Henry was telling me all about this huge slide I didn’t picture anything of the kind. Something for the kiddies I thought. It was after all in Bendigo, not exactly where I’d expect to find adrenalin activities that New Zealand hasn’t already claimed. Even when my sister talked about it I just smiled, thinking of course it seemed huge to the kids.  I mean, even I am huge to the kids.

When I saw the slide it didn’t look like too much. A bigger version of what you see in a park. The slide was in the Bendigo Discovery Centre. A massive building full of interactive displays, all science based, for the kids to play and learn with. The Vertical slide was the big attraction. So after some hours playing with the kids on all kinds of contraptions, and even joining them at a magic show, the slide opened. Everyone who goes on the slide has to put on overalls. So after doing that I joined the lengthening queue, noticing with some amusement that I was the only adult in a queue of about 30 kids. On the way up I listened to a mixture of bragging about how many times each kid had been on the slide and teasing of all the kids who had got to the top and bottled out. Apparently that was quite common with this slide. Fair enough I thought, they’re little kids and it’s a big slide. As I got close to the top I started to pay closer attention. To ride the slide you have to hang by your arms from a bar, with your feet dangling in mid air…and then let go!

Oh my. Butterflies were starting to make an appearance, although I was careful not to let it show in front of all the smart mouthed kids. I said lightly to the lady helping people grasp the bars ‘Bit scary isn’t it?’ to which she replied ‘yeah, the adults are normally more scared than the kids’. Fair play.  Kids haven’t learnt to respect gravity the way an adult has.  As I dangled from my arms I was sure feeling some respect.  Not just for gravity but for those damn smart mouthed kids!   It sure felt like a long way up, so I didn’t hang around.  As I let go an involuntary look of horror took hold of my face, to be quickly replaced by one of glee as I smoothly transitioned from free fall to fast sliding along the horizontal.

Nice one nephew Henry! That really was a cool ride, in a most unexpected place.  So you don’t need New Zealand for the big thrills.  Central Victoria has the drop.

This slide's so fast even pics of it are blurry...

Challenge 20 – Surfing Winter Solstice…

The sunset was golden. The waves were windblown and choppy. And the wind creating that chop had surely halved the stated temperature, which was just a smidge over double digits. The water temperature was fortunately a few points warmer.  It was, all things considered, quite fresh.

June 21.  Mid winter.  The shortest day of the year.  And there I was standing on the beach wearing the smallest swimming costume available to man, outside of Brazil and Kazakhstan.  Ai yi yi!

A friend had challenged me to surf in speedos, which I had never done before, on the shortest day of the year.  In a fit of humour and macho posturing I accepted their challenge.

Chilly billy surfing

I was up before the sun, and down at the beach in speedos before my brain could even register the rudeness of the hour, the frigidity of the air or the inappropriateness of my dress.  I was going to wear a woolly and warm bathrobe down to the beach originally, like a prize fighter ready for a fight, but Dad called me a wuss and I just took a towel instead.  It was only while my Dad (who was in town for a few days) was trying to figure out how to use my camera (and figure out how his son ended up near naked on the beach in the middle of winter) that I began to realise that my skin was not the ideal barrier to these chilling winds.  I suspect Dad was deliberately pretending the camera wasn’t working as there were a series of shots on the camera (see where I get it from?).   So, after a few photos where I looked as rigid as my board I paddled in.

Despite the chop I found a few fun small peaks to play on. I had a good laugh with an Irish surfer, sensibly decked out in a full suit of insulating rubber, about the limitations of my outfit.  After about 20 minutes though the arctic breath on my wet body was starting to seize me up.  I caught the last wave into the beach, but nearly cramped when I stood up.  My body was starting to seize.  I ran home to a very relieving hot shower, before cycling into work.  Even after a quick 10km cycle I still felt a little crisp in the centre. Nothing a nice hot cup of tea couldn’t remedy.

The fact that my Dad, a hardened Victorian who walks up to 14km every day in Victoria in often freezing conditions, got quite cold as he waited showed me I’d certainly taken on a challenge.  Interestingly I wasn’t the only one braving the cold in winter in Manly.  There’s a large crew of swimmers who swim every day just after daybreak from Manly to Shelly beach, many of them just in swimmers or speedos. Keen!

There was also some women dressed in pagan costume (over their swimmers) coming in from their paddle skis just as I was heading out.  So I found some good company in which to greet the shortest day of the year.  And the sunrise was spectacular as I watched it creep over the horizon from the water.  I let out a small cheer.  I think even the sun must get a surprise at how much flesh it sees in Manly every morning. If it could grin at all the goosebumps it probably would.

That day is now over, and as we look to longer light filled days I’ll be looking for warmer ways to enjoy our beautiful beaches.

And I’ll be enjoying these longer nights!

How very Manly!

The beautiful mid winter sunrise

Challenge 19 – Soup Night

This idea came from flatmate Kerrie.  A friend of hers had done this some years ago.  Held a soup night throughout winter, bringing friends together around a bowl of soup.  Laughter, fun and socialising, during months where people tend to lay low, due to the cold and the season.

I'm souper! Thanks for asking

And so began Reddall St soup night.  We’ve had 3 brilliant soup nights so far.  Each night we’ve had about a dozen quality people enjoying the soup that one of the alternating flatmates has concocted.  So far we’ve had delicious potato and leek, pea and ham and French onion.  Ooh la la.  So good!  The original plan was to have it every Tuesday throughout winter, totalling 16 nights of soup.  Due to some flatmate feedback though, and a need to keep harmony within the clan, it will now be a fortnightly schedule.  The first fortnightly soup night will be on Tuesday June 21^st, and every fortnight thereafter.  It’s a great social occasion, and a great challenge to us as we try to estimate how much soup to create.  I made almost 10 litres of soup for the French onion night, of which about 4 litres is now frozen as a backup soup.  I used about 15 onions, so pardon the gas from that one.

The word has been spread to a considerable number of people, but so far it has been different people each week, which has been heaps of fun.  People bring their own drinks, and maybe a starter or dessert, so it works out to be quite a tasty communal affair.

I’m a social person, and I love sharing these nights of fun with the flatmates and with my neighbours and friends.  Thanks to everyone who has attended and contributed so far, and I look forward to many more fun nights throughout the rest of the winter season.

Souperb!  Truly a souper idea.

Challenge 18 – Below the Line

It was 5am on a Monday morning.  Tracy and I had been up for an hour already.  We’d almost run out of fuel trying to find an open petrol station.  It was bloody cold.  And Tracey at one point while driving even casually remarked ‘I really should have bought my glasses’.  Very comforting.  Somehow we found the Flemington Markets, Sydney’s wholesale fruit and veg markets that also have a public buying area.  We discovered though that this didn’t open til 6am, already having paid our entrance fee and navigated screaming forklifts to ask for directions.

Enthusiasm: Check

Shopping list: Check

Preparation: Hey, let’s go to the biggest market, stuff will be cheap there!

Research: Huh?

Result: We turned back around and drove to the local greengrocer who opened at 7am.

So it began.

The challenge: Live on just $2 a day for 5 days from May 16th to 20th for all food and drink (luckily for us not including petrol).  No using anything you already have without taking into account what it would cost to buy the whole pack/container.  So if you use a pinch of salt you’d have to factor in buying a container of salt.  Any herbs from the garden, factor buying it at the shops.  Same with a sip of orange juice or tea.  Any free food had to be taken into account at buy the whole thing from the shop prices.

$20, all 2 can eat

The goal: Raise some awareness around the fact that $2 a day is the global benchmark for the poverty line (adjusted for inflation and currency from the 2005 data) and raise some dollars for some anti-poverty initiatives.  The reality is that 1.4 billion people on our planet live below this poverty line every day.  And they need to make this money cover not just food and drink but ALL their expenses, including housing, clothing and transport.

For us it was just a small insight into the challenges faced by so many on our planet simply to survive.  And the challenges many of our parents went through in the 80’s raising kids with interest rates spiralling upwards of 20%.  Mouldy bread sandwiches were a reality.

It staggered me over those 5 days just how much food there was available, that was offered free or was simply a choice that I would normally have made without much thought.  I wasn’t sure it was possible to live on $2 a day without some serious health consequences, but in the end we even had some change.  And no doctor required.  It sure had its moments though, especially when in meetings with afternoon tea laid out!  With good meal planning you could live on a much smaller budget than most of us normally do, there’s no doubt about it, although you’d include a lot more greens if you could afford it.  And you would be trying to avoid 4am wake up calls.  Monday night wasn’t pretty!  We both had busy weeks, so ensuring we had our food cooked and ready for each day was a big part of it.  Organisation.  What an interesting concept.

Thanks to those who sponsored us for the week.  It’s still possible to contribute  some cash to this cause which is raising some funds to spend in Papua New Guinea on some worthwhile projects.  If you feel like giving please follow this link:

http://www.livebelowtheline.org.au/TeamReddall?SID=410412&Lang=en-CA

The upshot:  I lost 2 kilos and gained an appreciation of what it’s like to have to watch every cent you spend, and consider carefully everything you put in your mouth.  And definitely an appreciation of how much organisation and planning it takes to live on such a budget.  Trace and I are also going to continue to cook and meal plan together, albeit well above the line.  Big up to Trace for taking this challenge on with me and turning it into an adventure!

Challenge 17 – Sing in a Choir

2011 is an all singing and dancing year!  This post is about the singing.  On Monday night I rocked up to the Manly church to join a community choir.

I figured I’d hide at the back, roar out loud on the chorus, then sing softly during the parts I didn’t know so well.  This always seemed to work well in a bar.  Or a disco.  Or even the shower.  Actually I normally make up the words I don’t know, but figured that particular strategy wouldn’t be so effective here.

I was one of the first to arrive in this lovely old manly Church, complete with pipe organ.  I was early probably due to the fact I read the time wrong on the website, which turned out to be a good thing.  I was tested for my vocal range as the maestro Ian ran through some notes on his keyboard.  Turns out my bass notes are better than my high notes, and I was joined with the baritones.

The Manly Choir - Jonah and the Wailers

There were 3 baritones including myself, and I stood between the other guys so I could hear how it was meant to go.  ‘Same key I think…’.  The problem with so few baritones is that I couldn’t hide anywhere!  And we went over each part of the song so thoroughly that there was no excuses not to know a part.  I had advice coming from the left (‘Just try and get the right key) and the right (‘Just try and get the length of note right first’).   We had a music sheet in front of us, which was useful once you started to remember some basic note reading.  Who knew that choirs worked like this?

The songs these guys sing have been given a real going over (Ian rewrites the songs himself, designed for the group), and every section has a different way to sing it.  I’ve never heard Amazing Grace sound so different, although we spent the majority of the night working on a song called ‘Steal Away’.  Ian puts a real south American gospel sound to it all.  The sopranos seem to lead off, with the tenors singing counterpoint a lot of the time, then the alto’s and baritone parts seem to be similar, adding real depth to the song.  Sure sounds good when everyone kicks into gear, even with me singing along!  They have been working on these songs for about 6 weeks now, so I was working hard to catch up.  And some of the guys, like fellow baritone Nigel, have been singing in community singing groups for 15 years.  Amazing.  He was telling me about a lot of the performances he’s done, including musicals

It sure was a learning experience, and I thought I went pretty well all in all, although there were some spots that tested me.  It was fun though, and it was nice to be part of such a cool sound.  I really enjoyed the end where we changed from standing in a circle to singing in 2 lines, as you would in a performance, and then singing the entire song that we’d been working on for the last few hours.  I think I’d need to put in considerable practice to catch up with these guys.  They’re putting in a performance at the end of the term and I asked Ian if I’d be up for that if I came every week until then (6 more weeks?), to which he said No.  That shattered my illusions of undiscovered talent.  However if I sang every week til the end of this term and then joined next term he’d be happy to have me.

People paying to hear me sing, what an inspiring thought!

Challenge 16 – You Tube Post

Yes, I know what you’re thinking.  So what?  You posted something to You-Tube.  My Gran has done that.

Well, hot damn!  This isn’t a video of your Gran’s birthday party.  I’ve just put a video up in a publicly accessible place, for the world to see, of myself dancing solo and unaccompanied in public.  Of my last dancing challenge no less.  I’m now on display like a strutting peacock; to be judged, to be observed, to be commented upon.

Luckily You Tube allows you to approve the comments, haha.  Given some of the mindless commentary on You Tube I’ve read I’m really surprised that option exists!

The video editing itself took some time, but the posting wasn’t so bad.  Until I hit the copyright alert.

I must admit when I was choosing some tracks to overlay that it didn’t even cross my mind about the copyright of the songs.  Turns out You Tube plays more than just a small part in policing the copyright of songs posted in clips (although they say to seek legal advice before uploading any copyright material).

Initially I thought that it must be ok, as I’d seen heaps of clips where people had used songs for part of them, and I couldn’t imagine most of these people writing to music companies requesting permission to use the song.

Then I found out how it really works.  You see, copyright holders are smart cookies.  The modern way to make money from your copyrighted material is firstly to allow You Tube to recognize it with their clever copyright recognition software.  Once they have they will then follow the instructions from the copyright holder, to either:

A) Block the content in a given country, set of countries, or completely block it

B) Track the post – to see how popular it is.  Now, I’m not sure if this is for Market research or whether to decide if they will prosecute you or not.  Or maybe to decide what advertisements they will put on your page

C) Monetize.  I can only assume this means that they will ask you for money.  Or maybe it ties in with B – that they will make money from the You Tube ads.

And that’s the crux of it.  They flood your post with ads, link in with i-tunes, and no doubt get a slice of all the action.  Clever stuff.  That’s what I call keeping up with the times.

So it turns out because of the 2 songs I used my clip isn’t visible in 192 different countries.  Meaning it’s probably only visible in Australia and the US.  And because of this I’ve posted a Silent version too, or at least one without songs dubbed over the top.

So I’ll give you the links to both.  The first with some music, as I wanted to demonstrate what was playing in my head:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uvXaw6JdMGI

The second is the version where all the tunes are internalised:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWmKf_bwab0

Out of interest, if you can be bothered (and assuming you’re in one of the few countries privileged enough to be able to watch both videos), let me know which one you preferred.  I might scrap the song one if it’s much the same.  Then when I hit 1 million views I won’t be expecting a bill in the mail!

Thanks again to Toby for his excellent filming, especially given the basic equipment I’d furnished him with (ie. A tiny point and shoot camera).  20 minutes of dancing footage was enough to put together a funky clip.  Thanks also to Christine for bravely joining me for a boogie!  And to Sebastion for patiently waiting for Toby and Christine while they indulged their friend.  And thanks especially to Trace and Andrew for their encouragement and support, and to everyone else who helped egg me on.

So, I’m out there.  Enjoy the music.

Challenge 15 – Silent Disco

The sky was overcast.  The dark clouds overhead seemed to have that knowing dark cloud grin, that they’d wait for just a few more people to leave home without an umbrella before they let loose.  It had rained periodically throughout the day but despite this there were a lot of people around.  It was Manly on a public holiday after all.

And all was as you’d expect.  People wandering around, taking a look at the beach.  People taking photos.  Nice 2 foot surf with lots of surfers taking advantage.  Plenty of families with kids getting some fresh air before the day was out. People walking, running, enjoying their day off.

And that guy dancing all by himself, with no music playing…what the…?

Yes, oh yes.  And did I dance.  And you just don’t stop, don’t stop til you get enough.  That was the tune bouncing around my head as I busted out the moves.  Under public scrutiny I forgot several moves that should have been front and centre.  I’d told my sister I’d do the ‘running man’, but only remembered later.  Man.  Does this mean I’ll have to do it again?

Anything’s possible.  The hardest part of this challenge was overcoming the fear to do it.  It fluttered around in my chest whenever I thought of it for days.  I’ve loved dancing for a long time, but the idea of doing it in public, with no music whatsoever definitely had me challenged!  And when I did it, I enjoyed it, mostly.  And I got paid to dance!  I was given a dollar from a pretty blonde girl.  It’s nice to be appreciated.  That has to be up there with getting paid to surf, haha.  I certainly won’t be giving up my recently reacquired day job though.   A number of people took photos and videos.  A friend Christine (pictured) even had a dance with me for a few minutes, but it didn’t quite catch on.  Thanks Chris!  And thanks Toby for his creative camera work (and the fun night surf afterward!).  You Tube, here I come!

Yes indeed, this brief 15 minute challenge had me shaking in my sweet yellow dance shoes as for 2 days I sweated over the possibility, and it took some work to push myself out there, but I’ve learned something today.  Something profound.  You can’t stop the music.  Nobody can stop the music.  Especially if nobody else can hear the music because it’s all in your head…

Eveybody dance now!

Challenge 14 – Chanting

I’m no stranger to using my voice in creative ways.  I know how to launch it across a room.  I can make it reverberate around a football stadium.  There was once a time in Central America where I made the screeching jungle monkeys all stop mid chest beat as they considered for a moment a more primal sound than their own.  I’ve frightened children and adults alike.   I have friends who call me the loudest person they know, and friends often can distinguish my voice from a cacophony of voices when in another room at a bar or party.  Alcohol raises my volume to industrial levels, to be sure, however you could safely say I’m naturally blessed with an ability to take it to 11 . When I was a bike courier with several of us called Mike I naturally became known as ‘Loud Mike’.

I can sneeze and have people at the other end of a building bless me.  My hearing has been average for years, and this can at times mean I talk louder than may be considered necessary, especially in noisy environments.  Still, it’s nice to be heard.  It can be a good thing though.  It once potentially saved the life of myself and a snorkeling companion in Thailand, when as we came around a rocky outcrop after an exploration we looked up to see the snorkeling boat sailing away from us. Yikes!   Most people would consider it out of vocal range, however I was able to call on my noisemaking ancestors and be heard.  Another headline avoided!

When asked if I can sing, my usual response is that opinions vary widely.  I’ve had people say I can’t sing to save myself and had people comment on how much they like my voice.  I’ve always enjoyed doing it though and have never been put off by adverse reactions.  Some may even say that’s encouraged me.  I’ve recently been practicing the softer, more mellow and soothing side of my voice as I put people into hypnotic trance. I’ve even taken advantage of their trance like state to sing to them, haha. Is that wrong?

The sanskrit symbol for that favourite universal sound: Om

So when the chance came to lend my considerable vocal gifts to a drum circle chant I of course accepted the challenge. This drum circle has been running in a warehouse in a quiet street in Manly Vale since mid last year. It started as a small group of around a dozen committed people, and was blessed with at least 3 very talented musicians, including some talented sax, flute and didgeridoo players. It’s a great group and I’ve always had fun whenever I’ve gone. The group meets every 2 weeks and between the often frenetic drumming and some fascinating and primal dancing is always a great night. It has now grown considerably and some nights might have as many as 40 people in the space. One of the reasons for the big increase has been the chanting guys that have arrived from across the harbour, from a place called ‘The Harmony Centre’.

I may have sung and even chanted a little in an occasional meditation before, however in this case the chanting goes for a considerable period, and allows you to really play with the sounds, as well as to add some drumming in if you feel like it and to let yourself get swept up in the group energy. I’ve now done it a number of times with these guys, usually the same 3 or 4 chants, in turn repeated over and over. Usually we were chanting the names of Indian gods, such as Shiva or Ganesh, with a beautiful recorded melody or with people playing guitar and leading. Sometimes it’s a mission working out how to pronounce the names, so you sing in a more mellow, hushed tone until you figure it out. It’s also inevitable also that you’ll give one final chant with gusto when everyone else has already stopped.  Haha.  Initially I thought the chanting went too long and interfered with the fun and rhythm of the drum circle, but I must say it really grows on you, and some of the chants start to bounce around your head. Given how many years I’ve had grunge or metal songs bouncing around my head it actually makes a soothing change. A couple of times I’ve seen the group energy shift from being really high to really mellow and accepting, or from energised with everyone drumming to ecstatic with everyone dancing after the chanting.

It’s nice to let your body go with the dance, to get swept up with the rhythm of the drums, and to let your voice soar and play with the two tones of a rhythmic chant. Lucky there’s no neighbours to the warehouse, that’s for sure!

I must admit though that it can be taken a bit seriously.  When a microphone was getting handed around on one of the evenings people were taking it in turns to sing the chant, then the group responded.  A friend had pointed out to me the similarity between the sound and the line ‘I come from a land down under’.  I of course wanted to share such a humorous observation with the group.  My initial substitution was given a few laughs, but when I repeated it the chanting people seemed less than impressed.  I should have warned them that there are dangers inherent in handing me a microphone.

There seems to be a whole wave of these new chanting hippies, with many of them rebranding themselves with single spiritual sounding names, such as one of their talented guitarists Matrea.  Cool!  Don’t worry though, I have no plans to ask you to start calling me Shangri-La anytime soon.

Namaste.

Unlucky Challenge 13 – Battle of the Bulge

Sometimes in life you choose your challenges, and sometimes your challenges choose you. 2 weeks ago I came in from a surf session with a really sore lower back, with what felt like bruising. It was sore for a few days and then receded a bit.  Naturally I surfed again, and cycled, played intense back to back 5 set games of squash, and worked, and pretty much acted business as usual. Every now and again it was giving me real pain though, and I knew it wasn’t quite right, but in a typical blokey way simply hoped it would disappear on its own. See what happens when there is nobody to nag you to see someone about it? After 2 days of hard yakka (see challenge 12) it decided to really start hurting. It was a struggle to put socks on, as I couldn’t bend very well, and today walking upright hurts. My body was trying to tell me something, and I don’t think it was trying to tell me to dance.

So I went to see an Osteopath for the first time! I’d been fortunate enough in my life to have never needed to see a chiropractor before, and had only been to a physiotherapist a handful of times. This time though I thought I’d better find out what was happening, lest I exacerbate the situation (ok body, now that you’re really hurting I’ll listen…). I’d worked alongside Osteopaths before when I used to do massage work, and I trusted their training and expertise. By this stage I suspected I had a bulging disc, as I had figured the pain to be very localised in one spot right on my lumbar spine (L4 or L5), and it was really sharp when my spine was in a certain position.

Mama!

Turns out there’s a good chance I was dead on. Although it can only be confirmed with expensive scans the Osteopath told me there was no need, as treatment would be the same regardless. She would stretch and massage me a little, for a nice fee, and I would allow my body to heal itself. This seemed like a lovely theory, except that then it got worse. I’ve been cycling into the course I’m currently doing in the city (ferry from Manly to Circular Quay, then 20 minute bike ride to Newtown), and the next hypnotherapy block starts on Wednesday in the same place, which I also plan to cycle to. My back feels fine for the most part while cycling, except last night I hit a bump and felt my lower back painfully spasm. Yikes! I’ve been practicing my contortionist face, and also trying to find the upshot of the sharp pain, such that it’s a great reminder I’m alive! It seems to just lock in sometimes, then I have to subtly shift it to ease my way out of it. So far I’ve kept screaming to a minimum (I’ve been practicing my tradie face). I saw the Osteopath again and it took half the time to walk home as to walk there, so she worked some kind of magic.

I’d done Pilates at work for the last couple of years, and this had made a massive difference to my core strength. I have noticed a distinct loss of flexibility over the last 3 months since I stopped, and this was surely a contributing factor. So I will offer up to the yoga gods a pledge; when my back heals I shall recommit some time to their worship each week.

Never fear though, I trust in my healing abilities. The Warrior Dash burn is only one thin strip of faded pink now. So I know I’ll be back, stronger than ever. I’m even doing some self hypnosis to move things along.

I’ll be aiming at some of the less mobile challenges over the coming weeks. Who’s up for a marathon scrabble session? Now there’s a challenge I could really throw my back into.

 

UPDATE, APRIL 9:

I found an Osteo that really knew her stuff, and has been using acupuncture as well as some gnarley spinal twists to help relive the pressure.  It turns out it’s not a disc at all (PHEW!) but a strained sacro-iliac muscular ligament.  Still bloody painful but in my mind less of a long term prospect.  Having said that I’ve had a couple of weeks where I can’t sit for more than 20 minutes at a time without it being hard to get up, and walking was a challenge for a few days.  I’m on the mend now though and am hoping one more Osteo session will do the trick!

Challenge 12 – Odd Job

No, not the mean looking James Bond character with the deadly top hat. Although potentially just as killer. Instead of cunningly bladed flying top hats I have spent a few days this week using cunningly bladed circular saws, table saws, drills and grinders. Yes indeed, the sparks were flying. At one point I was perched atop a ladder, grinder in hand, with sparks flying right at me as I attacked a square metal pole from all sides. I had sparks in my ear. If I had been clever enough I could have taken a photo that made it look like sparks were flying from my mouth. Ah well. Use your imagination. It turns out those sparks can hurt when they hurl against bare flesh. There’s something about work like this though that makes you impervious to pain that ordinarily would have you cursing or screaming. Although on day two I was wise enough to wear long sleeves.

So my odd jobbery has seen me helping a plumber friend do some carpentry work. This is indeed a man of many talents. It was cool to watch his clever problem solving skills as he calculated angles, plumbed, squared and danced a merry jig up and down ladders and all over fences and balconies, cutting out windows and constructing an impressive outdoor wall. It reminds me of when I was a kid watching Dad do all this kind of work. Isn’t it funny that some stuff just doesn’t stick? Although I paid much closer attention to Dad’s eating habits. Nailed that one! I guess if we were all the kind of men who built houses then who would be out hunting for food? Hmm? I bet I would have been top notch at that. Come back ‘ere you crazy mammoth!

Oh, and I’ve been doing some gardening work. Although the secatuer blades don’t seem nearly as menacing as spinning saw blades they are nonetheless sharp enough to make you count your pinkies at the end of the day. It took me weeks to recover from my gardening injury from my first day with this other landscaping friend (this guy is a plant genius, and he knows enough about sharp secateurs to warn me to keep them holstered when not in use), but again, I had my tradie face on. Impervious. What, that bleeding knuckle? Nah, let me throw some dirt on it and you won’t even know it’s there. There is also of course the amazing ability of work like this to make beer taste like heaven on earth.

And so the challenges continue. While it’s true I did 6 weeks of construction work in Canada on snowy roofs and icy decks using an imperial system and some really serious table saws and tricksy ladders, I think that in the context of this year the challenge of getting some coin in while I study is indeed worth a mention. Plus I make the rules.  So there.  Oh, and please send me some challenge ideas so I don’t have to do this detox plan I’ve been avoiding.  Eww. Trade ya for a beer.

Challenge 11 – Laughter Club

Ah yes, the laughter club. This one has been in train for some weeks, and after reading about Pooty’s laughable experience in Melbourne’s Fed Square I was understandably curious about what humorous devices would be used by this club in North Sydney. The fact that it was indoors and not public seemed to indicate this would be less about entertaining passers by with mime than connecting with your inner clown. And man, was my inner clown ready. He’d been putting on makeup, kicking up his oversized feet and juggling eggs as the time to laugh got closer and closer. I knew I’d be a little late as my challenge 10 (quite challenging, but in a good way) weekend class finished around the same time laughter class started. I was kind of expecting to be laughed at as I arrived late.

As it happened I arrived in time to hear a synchronised clapping of HA HA HA, HO HO HO, which was the wind down that the laugh leader (so he called himself) instigated between laughing fits to help the group relax. There were 7 of us altogether, a good mix of young and old, male and female We did a breathing exercise, then proceeded to do a whole series of laughing exercises, from starting a lawn mower with a haha, hahaha, hahahahaha, HAHAHAHAHA as you pulled on the starter lead through to pretending to whisper a secret in each others ears and laughing uproariously at the perceived joke.

To be honest I get the impression that it helps to leave your logical mind at the door and bring in your slightly deranged mind, normally reserved for quiet full moon nights alone, wild parties or other times when you can just let go and be completely in the moment. As it turns out I had no great trouble connecting with my slightly deranged mind.

Don't forget the milk!

Our last laughing exercise was to pretend to be Tarzan, beating on your chest as you made the Tarzan noise. Pretty amusing when you start playing with the sounds. Then one of the ladies asked if there was a Jane sound, to which I quipped ‘don’t forget the milk!’. That cracked her up, and for the rest of the session whenever we made eye contact we both lost it. Hehe. The next section we just sat still in a circle on the floor and all made eye contact, which involved lots more spontaneous laughs. Then we did a guided meditation to finish, through which I struggled to stay awake. Laughing that much is tiring.

All in all I found it really fun, but can definitely understand it would be a bit confronting to do it in public. The small group was good, as you could let go without fear of, er, being laughed at.

My inner clown was grinning on the way home. Mission accomplished.

Challenge 10 – Study Gestalt Therapy

 

Do you see a duck or a rabbit?

And so to the third course I’ve started this year, an Advanced Diploma in Gestalt Therapy. This one is four years part time, and will potentially lead into a masters if I decide to pursue it that far. I almost didn’t pursue it past the first hour to be honest! The teacher spent most of the time talking about her bifocals, her dyslexia and struggling to put together a description of the rather simple act of borrowing books. I asked a few questions and was mostly met with a wall of confusion, as she didn’t really seem to know the content of the handouts she had given us. It was almost comical, except that the course wasn’t exactly being given away for free, and there was going to be a hell of a lot of these Wednesday night classes over the next year!

So during the break I went for a walk, got some air, breathed deeply, and told myself that although her organisational skills were clearly not her strong point, she had been teaching first years for quite some time. Considering the school was still operational, and there was a class of 2nd year students, she can’t possibly be that bad at it.  So logically her knowledge of subject matter must be considerable and unrelated to the first impression she had made. I prayed the second half would begin to prove this!

It started off badly, as she struggled to find a beanbag she didn’t keep rolling out of. Then when she did get comfortable she almost fell out trying to reach her teaching materials. Sigh. When the challenge of sitting down was resolved though it began to be evident why she was the teacher, as we delved into what the course would be covering. I was being reminded of why I was here, and it was good. Gestalt is all about communicating in the moment. Regardless of what has happened in the past, you work in how that affects you in the now.  People make meaning in their life from their own interpretations (such as seeing a duck or a rabbit in the picture above).  Sometimes the meaning we make is not useful, and gestalt works to alter this perception in order to make a more supportive, life giving meaning.  It’s the kind of therapy that’s hard to explain, which is maybe why it hasn’t hit the mainstream, but I’m definitely intrigued by it. She started to hit on some very interesting insights, and it seemed clear that once past the practical confusions of running a class, this woman really knew her stuff. Phew!

It’s the first of four weekends throughout the year this weekend, and our class consists of 5 guys and 2 girls and will involve a lot of group work over the year. I’m guessing we’ll probably know more about each other by the end of the year than any of us really wanted to.  And yes I hear you ask, we do get to sit in beanbags during class.  Quack !

2012 update:  It turned out to be a phenomenal year.  I learnt so much about myself through this training, and my connection to other people.  The trainer was absolutely phenomenal in her ability to truly listen to someone, and to really understand their needs and what drives them.  Her ability to bring the theory to what was already happening in the room with the existing interactions was almost as impressive as her ability to bring laughter in immediately after some heavy duty work.  The logistics of managing time and running the class for me paled in comparison to the way she worked with the group.  There was so much safety in the group I shared things I never thought I’d ever tell anybody.  It was confronting.  Challenging.  Scary.  Empowering.  I loved it.  So much so I’ve enrolled for the next 3 years part time for their masters course.  Highly recommended!

Challenge 9 – Study Hypnotherapy

Milton Erickson - the founder of modern hypnosis

Earlier this year I did a short course in NLP (see challenge 1). At the very end of the course we did some hypnosis. I was intrigued. As the practitioner I felt so relaxed as I inducted someone into a hypnotic state, and I realised just how powerful a method this could be for facilitating change. And who wouldn’t be mesmerised (!) by such a skill?

The myths abound. Will I become all powerful? Can I ZAP you and make you cluck like a chicken? Is there anyone who will be able to resist my hypnotic tones?  Is it dangerous?  Well, let’s just say it’s a lot different to what most people think.

I decided I would study it. Then I imagined myself trying to start a business. After a while I picked myself up off the floor from the fits of laughter and promptly changed my mind. I explored lots of different options and enrolled in a Social Science degree, with a positive psych emphasis. 3 years of study. Wheee.

Then I decided to face my fears and returned once more to hypnotherapy. It felt right.

And so now dear people, as you read this you may be feeling more and more relaxed. You may be finding that you’re really enjoying this blog and you have very warm feelings towards the author. All your worries may seem to be dissipating with every word you read, and every breath you take. That’s right…

I’ve just finished my first 5 day block of face to face time and loved it. I haven’t felt this passionate about something for donkeys. Well, certainly in terms of something I can potentially make a living from. And it’s not the hypnosis, but the hypnotherapy. It’s about having your eyes wide open, and that suits me perfectly. Who knows where this will lead, but I sure like the direction. And for now, that’s enough.  I expect to have my diploma in under 6 months.  Let me know if you’d like to know more or if you’d like to play.  It will be an experience, that I can guarantee.

And so to finish I’d like to make a suggestion. Have a magical day.

Challenge 8 – Tai Chi

Over a number of years in parks near where I’ve lived there have been mystical looking old asian men and women performing the graceful art of Tai Chi. It looks so calming, and yet contained within each movement appears great strength. Karate Kid obviously had more effect on me than what I thought, as I’m sure Mr Miyagi was a Tai Chi master. Soon you will learn, young Grasshopper.

The ancient art of Tai Chi Chuan began in 16^th century China, with the literal translation as ‘Supreme Ultimate Fist’ or simply ‘The Ultimate’. Most practitioners these days do it less as a martial art than as a form of relaxation and stress release, however even pacifists can feel a little more confident when they have an ultimate fighting fist in their pocket. Yeah!

And so to my challenge. After some internet research and a couple of phone calls I’d established the time and place. Or so I thought. I turned up to the Manly community Centre 5 minutes early and looked around. I saw a sign advertising a different Tai Chi class on Saturdays and nothing for the one I’d signed up for. I was getting the feeling that maybe it wasn’t the right place after all. I went upstairs and peeked into the only occupied room to hear a guy talking and see several people glare at me. I wasn’t getting a Tai Chi vibe at all! I went back downstairs and saw a page stuck to the open door advertising that tonight was the anger management group. Oops. Luckily no fighting fists required. I called Jenny, who was running the Tai Chi, who informed me it was down near the beach tonight and that they were only in the Community Center in the colder months. My friend Edith joined me and we wandered down to find Jenny and 6 students waiting for us. Cool!

It turns out Jenny is a Chinese Medicine practitioner and Acupuncturist who runs the Tai Chi classes as a hobby. She has been doing Tai Chi since she was 15 years old in China, which means some quality decades of practice. The wind was howling, however as she took us through the ‘cat walk’ and some of the basic ball holding movements (don’t drop the ball…perfect!) we kept warm and focused. The setting was fitting as we faced the crashing waves of Manly beach and followed Jenny’s movements. Quite a challenge when you start adding the arm movements to the ‘cat walk’ and to meet the high standards Jenny hoped from her students! We had some good laughs though as we tried to follow the graceful steps she performed. The batteries in her portable music player were dying, so when her Chinese music played there were some wonky, warbling notes, much to our amusement. Jenny was very funny, as she would alternately berate and praise her students. We did well with the praise, however I have the feeling she was being kind to us as we were new. Some of the students who have only been there a few weeks weren’t so fortunate. It should be good motivation to do well!

Jenny told us to practice the cat walk this week, so I have some homework to do. This is one I’d love to get better at, as it seems such a meditative set of movements. Another class, some more skills to learn. Maybe I should make time management my next challenge!

So, if you’re in Manly at 6:45pm on Mondays, head to the beach opposite the Pacific Hotel. Look for the ultimate graceful swan and the wobbly little ducklings trying to imitate her.

Wax on, wax off!

Challenge 7 – Warrior Dash.

Two words: Warrior Dash.

That was the email Pootman sent to me to begin the ball rolling for what turned out to be quite an epic weekend. An American concept had been bought to Australia for the first time. Encourage people to get in touch with their inner warrior and race around a bush track chock full of challenging obstacles, with the goal of having a shedload of childish (I mean, heroic) fun as you rolled in mud, waded through rivers, climbed walls and overcame barriers.

And did we have fun!

Pootman had managed to enlist the services of his friend Kristy, now forever known to me as the warrior princess. Not only did she do the driving duties for the weekend (the Glenworth Valley is 2 hours north of Sydney) but she also managed to provide most of our camping gear and drinks!

Nice one Xena.

We dressed in costume and were going to run in costume, then thought better of it. The loincloth that I had spent hours putting together during the week simply didn’t have the kind of double stitched engineering required to withstand the rigours of the course. It only had single stitch. A special mention must go to Xena here for her great attention to detail whilst applying my warpaint, as well as her willingness to get so close to my near naked body as she helped me pin my loincloth in place. ‘Getting to know you…’!

And so we donned some basic running gear, some warpaint and then went off to battle!

The race started with massive shooting flames into the air, which warmed my back nicely. I yelled out ‘it burns’ in what turned out to be a prophetic announcement. We ran quite a few kilometres to to the first obstacle. On the way I gave Pootman a piggyback-ride a short way for a laugh. Another sign of things to come!

The first barrier was just an over and under wall to get us warmed up. Then came our first real challenge – a long stretch of deep MUD. I chased Pootman valiantly for most of this muddy stretch until I finally caught him. We both went down in a bear hug wrestle, soon to be joined by Xena who came in with a splattering body slam. This mud was so thick that a considerable number of people lost their shoes to it as they tried to wade through it. Getting up was a challenge in itself!

Then into rivers, across balance beams, through a wrecked car yard after running through a series of tyres, military style. More mud. More wrestling. More river crossings. It got to the point that after you got clean from the river you were really looking forward to the mud again! My skin is glowing. And I still have mud working its way out of my ears.

And then to the final set of challenges. To roaring fire barriers and the last muddy pit. As we approached the barrier Xena spontaneously leaped onto my back. I had faith in my powerful warrior legs and immediately set off towards the wall of fire (appropriately known as the ‘Warrior Roast’), with the cheers of the crowd ringing in my ears as they realised just how awesome a spectacle of bravery they were about to witness. My momentum was good, I pushed strongly off the back leg and we sailed over the flaming wall. It was then I realised that there was more to this mighty obstacle than met the eye as several flaming logs had spread out at the base on the other side, making it wider than anticipated. As we went down the momentum rolled Xena safely clear of danger, whilst fate decided a fitting momento of the weekend (and maybe a fitting lesson) would be a branded left calf from one of the red hot and fiercely burning logs. The cheering of the crowd turned into a chorus of “ooohh’s” as they realised how fine a line there is between awesome ambition and awesome stupidity. Yes indeed, this was real fire. Bloody hot fire. And I now had a second degree burn to prove it. There was however nothing like a quick dip in the final muddy pit to soothe my new tattoo. After taking our time with some conquering warrior photos back at the campsite we eventually got around to washing off in the river.

Xena not only managed to impress the locals with her naked bathing upstream as a local elderly gentlemen was left speechless, she also managed to see Pootman and I in a Brokeback Mountain moment upon her return. Ah, the great outdoors!

We dressed up, I had my wound dressed (thanks St John’s!), and we kicked on to the afterparty for some dancing with our weaponry in the rain and to watch the guys who carried a bar fridge around the entire course take out best costume. Then we had a night of touring around all the campsites to meet people and have a great laugh about the event. I can honestly say I’ve never had my butt checked out by so many people, male and female, in my life. I wonder why loincloths went out of fashion?

There’s one thing I know for sure. Next year the waiver form is going to have a new addition:

Warriors must not take passengers across the Warrior Roast!

Challenge 6 – Applied Kinesiology

I’d known about the existence of Kinesiology for some time, ever since I studied massage years ago and knew some students who were studying it. And I always thought I had an idea about what it was, until someone asked me to explain it to them. Then I realised I didn’t have the faintest idea.

And so to ‘Echoes of Healing’ in Freshwater, where I used to massage. The owner Kimberly is an accomplished massage therapist and is now turning her considerable talents over to Applied Kinesiology. She invited me to do a series of sessions with her in exchange for some surfing lessons. Now there’s a barter system I’m most happy to encourage! Please write to me with offers for consideration.

As Kimberly explained, Applied Kinesiology was developed by a chiropractor in the 1960’s who realised there was a connection between the state of our internal organs and the strength of their specific corresponding muscles. Through testing these muscles one can determine structural, chemical and mental aspects of health and determine appropriate treatments to work with any found weaknesses or to enhance stated goals.

It is based also on Traditional Chinese Medicine and the energy that flows through our body through specific channels called meridians, or energy centres called chakras. It was easy, painless and to be honest it seemed remarkably insightful.

The testing showed I had been denying my loneliness and through a pseudo relationship that I’ve had for the last six months (with someone not ready for another dedicated relationship) developed a real despondency towards finding a loving, intimate, long term relationship with someone who was ready and available for it. Struth! I went in quite positive with a goal of looking at my future career and we ended up discovering I was probably better off looking at relationships. This session awakened that feeling of despondency in me and I was a bit down for the better part of the next two days. It did highlight to me though that maintaining a pseudo relationship that meets some of your instinct to be intimate with someone does a great job in preventing you from being ready for a real relationship with someone who could be a potential life partner. I don’t think I’ll add dealing with this pseudo-relationship down in the list of challenges, but it sure is something I’ll need to face in order to move on.

So thanks Kimberly for pointing out my denial! I did know that I had to move on, but this has highlighted it to me clearly and shown me how little energy (Kimberly measured it at 2%!) I had toward meeting a potential life partner because of it.

Interesting stuff! I’m looking forward to our next session.

Challenge 5 – Writing this blog!

Man, this took some work to get going. I had the page open and staring at me for a week. I played a little with trying to find a decent theme (it appears Pooty has already taken the only cool one) and find my way around. I got bored pretty quick and left it for another week. Then I came up with the brainwave of actually writing these entries first, then pasting them in. I figured that with some content the site will look more interesting and I’ll be more motivated to tweak it!

Although even with some content I was scratching my head a bit when I looked at it, and kept putting it off. I’ve now returned to it and hope that today will be the day I make it functional!

I remember talking to a career coach last year and telling him I love writing. ‘Oh yeah’ he said. ‘What do you write?’. I didn’t write anything much, just the occasional poem or diary entry. He’s right you know. If you really want to do something or love to do it, then there’s no better way to practise it, have fun with it and play with it than just doing it! Thanks again to maestro Poot for the inspiration.

It turns out that Blog isn’t just a stupid sounding word. It’s a great way to dump out thoughts, ideas and all manner of ill thought rubbish with which to bore anyone with too much time on their hands. Oh dear, did I just break a golden rule of blogging by insulting my readers? Nah, you have to have readers for that to happen, haha. Let me know if you were insulted, we’ll do a quick survey. I’m a quick learner, and if there are more people insulted than not I’ll change my blogging ways. Honest.

Challenge 4 – Stand Up Paddle Boarding

Yes. The challenge where it all began. Where Pootman sailed into town and mesmerised me with stories of incredible feats of valor and daring. Of phenomenal acts of creativity. Of the most stupendous possibilities of doing whatever the hell you wanted, all in the guise of meeting on average one challenge per week over a whole year. Oh yes!

And so I joined him for his 9^th challenge. This for me is challenge 4, as I’d already started the year with some novel new experiences.

And so, unlike Mark who plans on a challenge a week, I’ve chosen the more liberating ‘average one challenge a week’ style. I figure then I’ve got a great excuse to go to the Galapagos islands at the end of the year to piggyback-ride all manner of unusual creatures.

Wow, keeping focussed on these blogs is hard work! See challenge 5 for how much work it took me to get this thing going.

So, ahem, paddle boarding. I first saw this in Hawaii and it looked wicked. For some reason though almost every surfer I know hates paddle boarders. They think it’s not a real sport, that it looks stupid and that if they had their way they’d ban the damn things. The reality though is that they are somewhat jealous. A good paddle boarder moves much more quickly than a surfer, therefore gets more waves, and they can do it on the tiniest waves available.

Mark was running out of time for his week 9 challenge, and as he’d come to visit me in Manly for the day this became our mission. We were almost foiled from the beginning as Manly beach wouldn’t let us hire one as the beach had been closed. We looked at the widswept, bumpy, ugly 2 foot of surf and thought ‘ah well, let’s go try it on the harbour side’. On the way over we discussed that although it would be a little boring we could probably liven it up with a bit of ferry bow wave riding, or with some mid paddle board swaps. Definitely some races.

Then we tried it. Oh. Shit. I couldn’t stand on the thing for more than 10 seconds without doing an inelegant face plant. Huge entertainment for the numerous beach goers and people drinking at the wharf bar and skiff club to be sure. Thank god Manly beach had been closed…that would have been a disaster! We managed to wobble our way out past most of the boats, before realising that the wind had been pushing us out, and we had some work to do to get back in! In the process I discovered that the advice of the guy who hired the boards was purely to make us look uncoordinated. Once I dropped his advice and found my own style I was soon motoring along and didn’t fall in the second half. Wow, there’s a lesson in expectations! Now that we both had our balance, and a few fun races were over we returned the boards with some humility and a surprisingly large sense of accomplishment! That was considerably more challenging and fun than I had expected.

Loser of the races pays for the next session Pootman. I’m looking forward to your next visit! Anyone else game?

Challenge 3 – Power Yoga

Unlike my ‘Life of Eye’ friend Pootman I love yoga. Or rather, I love the stretchingness (why is that not a word?) of it and the feeling you have afterward: a mixture of zen and being more aware of yourself.

So, despite my preference for the more relaxed and meditative Hatha style of yoga, I had heard from a surprising number of people about the new ‘hot’ yoga or power yoga. The idea sounded ludicrous. They heat the room to over 30 degrees and you do a very dynamic yoga, until before long you’re literally dripping with sweat. Well, the testimonies to how amazing and cleansing this yoga was, along with their cheap intro offer (and the fact I had lots of time on my hands) lent me to go and give it a try.

On advice from a friend I only wore board shorts, took in a large towel and a bottle of water. The first 10 minutes were ok, but before long the taps were on and I was getting blinded by my own sweat. Trying to use the towel you’re kneeling on in the middle of downward dog to wipe your face, and to grab a quick drink of water before the next salute to the sun sure adds another degree of challenge!

I had anticipated that balance poses would have been dead easy given how thick the air was with heat and sweat. Apparently it wasn’t that thick, and given there must have been 80 students in the room, all packed in like sardines, I had a startlingly clear vision of being the first in a series of sweaty human dominoes.

The verdict: Well, it sure was a workout, and you felt like you’d just finished a marathon. Who knew the human body could sweat so much while seeming to do so little? I went back for a 2^nd class (I had a do all the classes you want in 10 days intro pass) and while I enjoyed it, it didn’t change my world. 2 classes in 10 days was enough to convince me that my motivation to surf still remained considerably higher than my motivation to go to the yoga sweatshop.

Challenge 2 – Salsa Dancing

Ever since I was chatting to an old bloke about 4 years ago I’ve felt a strong desire to learn to dance. Yes, I can hear you thinking ‘but man, you’re one of the funkiest dancers I’ve ever seen!’. And while modesty prevents me from doing anything but smile at such accolades, I knew there was another level of dancing that awaited me. The old bloke had asked if I was married. When I said no he told me that he has been married for 40 years. He has danced for over 40 years now, and he met his wife through dancing. He winked at me and said ‘son, get out there and dance!’.

Well, I’m sure the old fella could waltz like it never did go out of fashion, but after being to Cuba and seeing just how sexy salsa is, the answer was clear! And so in January I began the journey. Every Sunday night for an hour, for 8 weeks, I’ll endeavour to 123, 567 my way across the floor, to spin and twirl, and to really impress the ladies by not stepping on their feet. After just our second class I went to a salsa night with another student, an adventurous Swiss girl named Regi (Who from my experience knows every second person in Manly). We watched people carving it up all over the floor. Some of them made our jaws drop. Any new student in their right mind would be crazy to join that throng, knowing only how to do 2 shuffles and a spin. Fortunately that heady mix of South American beats and the smell of bourbon pulled us far away from any such reality check. I’m sure there were many women there who wished I was twirling them repeatedly, with exactly the same move, over and over. Needless to say I had it nailed by the next class, and am looking forward to many more nights out with students from our class.

Who knows, maybe in 40 years I’ll be that old man giving that advice ‘…get out there and dance!’.

Challenge 1 – NLP course

Having been blessed with a redundancy last year I decided that 2011 was going to be a major year of change. Why work 5 days a week when you can be out swimming and snorkelling, chilling out in the back yard with a good book, or partying on Wayne?

Ok, so this isn’t the entirety of my plan for 2011, but it sure has been a great start!

Did I ever tell you about my amazing job for the last 3 years, where I not only worked with great people but I was able to surf at lunch, or play squash, or tennis, or go for a run on the beach? Where the gym paid you to attend and had great pilates classes. No? Liar. I told everyone!

Needless to say it not only provided 3 great years on Sydney’s beautiful northern beaches and made me some great friends, it helped get me addicted to surfing. It also reminded me that although quite good at working with technology, my real strengths lie in working with people. And so for 8 days at the start of this year I did a course in Neuro Linguistic Programming. Otherwise known as mind control.

 

MAHAHAHAHAHA!

Well, more about control of your own mind, although it gives you some great tools for working with other people and their beliefs, as well as some insights into the workings of the subconscious. The use of language and patterns of behaviour…all fascinating stuff. This lends itself well to helping people work with patterns of behaviour they would like to change, or with reducing the emotional content of memories to help people move past blocks. I intend to use it to improve the areas of my life that need work, and in the process learn skills that I can use to help others. This year I intend to breathe and flow.

Another challenge for later this year will be a hypnotherapy course I plan to take. I plan to hypnotise some of my friends and plant a suggestion that they would love to financially contribute to my new career. Haha. No, I’m sure that’s not even possible. Or is it? I will be looking for vict…er…volunteers later in the year, so stay tuned!